Thursday, February 08, 2007


At first, I was wondering if this was a WW2 anniversary of some sort and feared my ignorance... Then I got it - it was the other thing in which all is fair.

Romantically speaking, I was the fat kid for a long time... I didn't get too many of the sweet and winsome Valentines that Ricki mentions, and felt rather put off by the "bling for a fling" genre of gift-giving. I mean, some of those ads really strongly imply that a woman is obligated to pleasure a man given a certain dollar-value gift - or worse, that the man is obligated to meet that dollar value to repay a woman's attentions.

I'm learning the other side of this fence now that I'm getting married.

A woman naturally likes to know that she's a treasure herself; from there it's easy to introduce the lie that to tell her so requires spending a treasure, and from there easier still to drop the truth entirely, and let men think that spending the treasure is the only thing required. Well, you can tell it's a lie because it doesn't work. The woman stays unhappy and thinks she's neglected, and all the guy can do is say, "But I got you x, y, and three of z!" And then the woman feels guilty because he did do that, but it wasn't what she really needed - they both bought a total bill of goods along with all of that ridiculous pink swag.

So, no, the whole idea of being bullied into buying expensive dust-catchers doesn't please me. (The Ladybug, thankfully, does not do this.) On this score, being engaged is, in essence, one long V-Day - "Oh, this package is ten bucks more per person; this cake has a small upcharge; for $100 bucks more you can also... and isn't it worth it on her special day?"

Ahem. First off - "Her" is STANDING RIGHT THERE. If she's worth the extra ten bucks a head, she can be spoken to directly. Second - we plan on the day being special because of the special person we're marrying, not because we sprang for fireworks and a flight of doves over the reception hall. I'd love to give her a fairy-tale event, but I'd much prefer the happier-ever-after.

I do have a question for Ricki, though - you say, "...don't EVEN MENTION the other made-up holiday that some talk about celebrating on March 15." Maybe this one really is a WW2 anniversary, because the only other thing I can think of here is the Ides of March. I mean, I could round up all my senator friends for a little stabby fun, but is that romantic?

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