Do NOT take Eric Staal in your fantasy draft.
Seriously, it's kiss of death time. The Hurricanes will finish 25th in the conference this year and be demoted to the AHL. Cam Ward will move his locker to the opposite corner of the clubhouse. The Staal family will remove all sharp objects from Eric's immediate vicinity, including his own skates. Anything to keep him safe.
On a related note, the Mets have lost eight consecutive ball games. Here's your reason.