In the famed words of Emperor Joseph II* in Amadeus – “Well, there it is.”
Let Thursday, March 23 stand as the day that my tournament bracket officially fell off a cliff and caught fire on the way down. Since I’d seen this coming last week, when Sports Guy’s bracket eerily coincided with mine, I’ve decided to go Simmons-style and dish awards:
The John Starks Golden Brick - Duke’s JJ Redick, 3-18 shooting in a loss to LSU. Apparently this was simpler than faxing all the GMs in the NBA with a letter saying, “Take me in the second round.”
The Powerball - Duke’s Shelden Williams, who should buy Redick the car he can no longer afford after his 23 and 13 kept the Blue Devils in the game. He had a man’s game and moved himself up the board.
The “This is Our Year – Starting in October” Award - Gonzaga. I went to bed with them up a dozen. OK, it was a better tease than they usually give us in the Sweet 16, but from now on we’re just going to call this the “Zagged When We Should Have Zigged Award.”
The “Bigger Numbers are Better” Trophy - Two 11’s, two 12’s, and one each of the 13 and 14 seeds won in the first round; three others (#13 Pacific, #14 Murray State, and #15 Winthrop) gave a lot of bracketeers the heebie-jeebies. Then two of the three opponents of those schools lost in the second round – UNC and Tennessee. (Only BC survived, primarily because their second-round opponent was #12 Montana.)
The Routine Thing that Only Seemed Strange - Memphis 80, Bradley 64. Given the setup above, it was a little surprising to see a number 1 manhandle a lesser squad.
Random Bobby Riggs Moment - to Jason Whitlock for this essay. I’m not sure that I agree with the whole “dunking is bad” bit. The macho poseur stuff is the problem with the men’s game, and you don’t need dunks for that. (Think of Dikembe Mutombo’s finger-wagging act after blocks.) But the sudden notice of Candace Parker for her ma’am dunks illustrates something I find a little ridiculous: instead of enjoying it for what it is, people are looking for cosmic significance in the only two rim-touching plays in women’s tournament history.
It’s insulting to the women to only value them inasmuch as they can play like the guys. Really – I think that people enjoyed those plays simply because they were “moments,” and not because they were good plays. (Parker’s ball-handling and passing don’t lead Sports Center, do they?) And deep down, it also illustrates something few people are willing to hear: the women’s game is not as deep, not as athletic, and not as skilled. When was the last time that a double-digit seed made their Sweet 16? (Answer below.) To me, that’s not really a problem. I enjoy the women’s game and I hope that Rutgers can finally stop being the Lady Zags in the NCAA’s. But enough already with the “we’re just as good” business, because it’s patently not true, any more than my roller hockey team could hit the ice and beat a team of pros. That doesn’t stop me from playing anyway, and it shouldn’t detract from the women’s tournament either. In fact, I hope that Parker dunks in every game she plays for the rest of her life, so people can stop acting like it’s the second coming of the 19th Amendment.
The Henry Ford “History is Bunk” Award - according to Sports Center, the last five champions all won their first two games by double-digits. The only two teams remaining to which that applies? Florida and Memphis. Neither has yet played anything stronger than a ninth seed, and Florida’s opponent tonight is #7 Georgetown, who is perfectly capable of beating the Gators.
The “Will You Shush, Already?” Award - Georgetown. By typing the previous item, I probably broke Ashanti Cook’s ankle. Seriously, I ought to be quarantined this year.
The Not Dumb Enough to Be Smart Award - yours truly, I’m afraid. Our pool’s scoring system means that, if you picked every single game correctly, you'd earn 183 points. (It also would mean that you should use your powers for something more lucrative than the NCAA Tournament.) Our winner typically has 140-160. Since my bracket didn’t seem that strong I actually filled out a second bracket and changed my mind a bunch of times. (This is NEVER a good idea.) That second bracket is already totally cooked, at 45. But here’s the twist – it’s not even the worst bracket remaining, because a coworker put up a 44. AND that first bracket? Three of my Final Four are gone, so even if I win out I’ll only have 65. So I was right about that bracket but, given the chance, made even stupider choices. BOTH brackets wouldn’t add up to a competitive total. I shall now jump into a pile of rusty nails.
The Annie Oakley Medal - Texas' Kenton Paulino. Anything WVU can do, he can do better. What a finish.
See, that's what I was talking about - solid in-depth coverage, intriguing stories, and a minimum on the "gee whiz, look at us, we play basketball too!" nonsense.
The Gonzaga Memorial Gack - The New Jersey Devils, who blew a 4-1 third-period lead and lost to Atlanta. They may decide to give Ken Daneyko his jersey back, instead of hanging it in the rafters tonight.
The Nixon Award - to ESPN, for missing 18 minutes' worth of boxscore. Notice a few missing items? Like, half the goals? Compare it to SI.com's scorecard for the same game. It's a little silly for the Worldwide Leader to screw up something so simple, unless they stopped caring the moment they gave up the NHL broadcast rights.
Just a hunch - Adam Morrison will go back to school. It just can't sit well with him to leave his college career on such a note.
The Head of the Classiness Award - UCLA's players helped Morrison off the court and consoled him.
Dispatches From the Metal Shop - again, ESPN seems to forget that there are still other teams playing - like the entire NIT. I know it's smaller news, but how about a bracket or something? I mean, Maryland was the NCAA champion a few years ago - did they stop using the Internet, even if it's bad news?
The Real Reason We Build Arenas Award - Go Frozen Four. Any dedicated puckhead has to pay attention to the college game, the source of much of the NHL's young talent. Besides, it is very exciting hockey, and that's the whole point.
And the answer is – last year. 13th seed Liberty became the lowest-ever seed to make a Women’s Sweet 16, but they were waxed, 90-48, by LSU. Before that:
2004: UC-Santa Barbara (11)
2003: Notre Dame (11)
2002: BYU (11)
2001: Missouri (10)
This year’s bracket has nobody below an eight (Boston College).
Here’s the men’s list for the same time, btw:
2006: Bradley (13), George Mason (11)
2005: Wisc-Milwaukee (12), NC State (10)
2004: Nevada (10)
2003: Butler (12), Auburn (10)
2002: Missouri (12), Southern Illinois (11), Kent State (10)
2001: Gonzaga (12), Temple (11), Georgetown (10)
Bold indicates winners – very rare, of course, though George Mason has a good shot against Wichita State (7).
*update, March 27, 7:00 pm - I had Franz Josef at first, not Joseph II, and as reliably mentioned by Dave J in the comments, that's the wrong dude. Drat. But howzabout George Mason! They've been recognized accordingly with the bold text.
Friday, March 24, 2006
Thursday, March 23, 2006
I did not have relations with that steroid, Stanozolol
According to ESPN, Barry Bonds' lawyers have announced that he plans to sue the authors of "Game of Shadows" for their extensive documenting of Bonds' relationship with steroids.
Note that they aren't suing for libel. The suit "will ask a federal judge to initiate contempt proceedings 'for the use of illegally-obtained' grand jury transcripts the authors used in writing the book." And PS, we also want "a temporary restraining order forfeiting all profits from publication and distribution."
Oh, please, oh pretty please, go right ahead...
Apparently Barry's ego is so large even his oversized skull cannot contain it. It's unbelievable that he'd want an open airing of this evidence in court, before media hordes. Either he's managed to convince himself that he's innocent or he's taken so many steroids he thinks he's now bulletproof. This is like a circus with better pitching - you've got clowns, a freakshow, a ringmaster, concessions of dubious quality, and now the announcement of a high-wire act. Step right up to that plate, young man - let's see if you can ring the bell!
Note that they aren't suing for libel. The suit "will ask a federal judge to initiate contempt proceedings 'for the use of illegally-obtained' grand jury transcripts the authors used in writing the book." And PS, we also want "a temporary restraining order forfeiting all profits from publication and distribution."
Oh, please, oh pretty please, go right ahead...
Apparently Barry's ego is so large even his oversized skull cannot contain it. It's unbelievable that he'd want an open airing of this evidence in court, before media hordes. Either he's managed to convince himself that he's innocent or he's taken so many steroids he thinks he's now bulletproof. This is like a circus with better pitching - you've got clowns, a freakshow, a ringmaster, concessions of dubious quality, and now the announcement of a high-wire act. Step right up to that plate, young man - let's see if you can ring the bell!
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
We are outraged! but only if it's OK with you
updated - March 23, 12:55 pm - if you don't want to plough my rocky, furrowed thought, the Coalition offered an excellent summation of the problem: "This Sharia stuff is gonna bite us in the butt sooner or later; especially when we seem bent on pulling down our pants and bending over." Man, I wish I'd thought of that. But read on anyway, please - there's also an update at the bottom.
By the way, guys, I tracked you back and it seems not to be working. Other bloggers hither and yon are getting out the word on Abdul Rahman, the Afghani in peril of execution for becoming Christian.
The West is not to blame for this - at least, not in the sense that we're the ones holding Rahman in a cell, trying to decide whether he is fit to be killed or just crazy for leaving Islam. Luckily some people are doing all that can be done. I will be calling myself. But outside the blogworld I see a lot of blasé about it all.
Try to follow me here.
I was angered when some fool decided to dunk a crucifix in a pot of piss and call it art - and used my money to pay for it all. It was meant as an insult and taken as an insult. But that is not persecution. Nobody was killed or jailed. Now we have the real thing. It deserves a stronger response from the civilized world, and yet all I hear (officially) is a nancy-boy Official Statement about "respecting personal freedom" and "raising the case" with the proper authorities.
In other words, we are so caught up with our own little niceties that we are missing the big picture. We can't storm the jail and free him by force - but why can't we openly condemn this act? Why can't the President say, "We didn't pound on the Taliban so you could act just like them." The blogworld is up in arms, and thank God, but where are the self-approved social bellweathers?
Susan Sarandon is arm-in-arm with Cindy Sheehan, and will shortly be portraying her on-screen. George Clooney is bravely accepting awards for opposing Joseph McCarthy, who's been dead nearly fifty years. I bring them up not to have a go at Hollywood-bashing but to raise a point - the real red-letter moment in Edward Murrow's campaign against McCarthy wasn't that a dangerous fascist was finally brought to account. In fact, McCarthy's accusations have turned out to be accurate, and the Soviet Union really HAD infiltrated many levels of the US Government. Murrow, however, succeeded in making the image the message. McCarthy was also a demagogue and a bully - at least, the parts of him that Murrow and CBS chose to exhibit. Because of this, his warnings were discredited as well.
By and large, the West has fallen for image over substance ever since. So, when the Piss Christ and the Danish cartoons are set side-by-side, there is a certain parallel appearance, so the media stop there - but the Christian reaction to the one is peaceful protest, and the Muslim reaction to the other is rioting and pillaging. This suggests that the Piss Christ is a lot less accurate than the Mohammed Bomb Turban; it also suggests that the surface similarity ends the instant anyone tries to find supporting evidence.
But that brings us back, full circle, to the tepid protest from our government. We are, quite simply, afraid that this will be another Cartoon Moment, and that a strong protest will get Muslims tossing rocks and decrying the new Crusade descending on their shores. We are so afraid of it, in fact, that we go out of our way to fail to mention certain inconvenient truths. Ironically, let's let a blogger named Crusader drop the clue: He quotes an article where a neighbor of Rahman's describes why he was turned in.
This guy neglects to notice that it was his side launching those wars, and is more insulted by the conversion than he is by the great swaths of fellow Muslims who endorse or carry out murders, honor rapes and killings, tyrannies, ethnic warfare, and too many other brutalities to mention. Meanwhile, the man who has done this "shameful" thing has also left behind all the things in the current Muslim world that pass for virtue, things they don't bother hiding.
Only a willfully blind society could hear the open declaration of hostility and the stated motives and yet bend over backwards to deny both the motive and the hostility. Why else wouldn't you believe the chants, the deeds, and the open declarations? Maybe people think we're being nice about it, trying to prove our tolerance and fairness. In doing so, we prove that we aren't fair at all, since we're not willing to stand up for fair treatment of ourselves.
But in the long run, honesty is much less insulting. This inability to admit what we see every day says that we don't take the enemy seriously - that we don't even take them seriously enough to use the word "enemy." On some level we watch the demonstrations and burning cars and intifada and say, "Isn't that cute? They're being international!" Then we set them up at a kiddie card table in the UN and treat them with a legitimacy they value only as a strategic asset in their continuing aggressions.
In effect, we're doing to them what was done to McCarthy - we miss the substance of what is said because we're distracted by non-essentials. We're trying to appear equal instead of working toward actual equality.
An open condemnation of religious persecution would say that we think of the new Afghanistan as a liberated country of adults who can handle a little criticism maturely. Ironically, they're the ones dealing with us as adults - "We want to kill you and make our religion pre-eminent on Earth, by force" - and we are too childish to admit it.
double update - March 23, 1:12 pm - from MSNBC (w/t to the Coalition): Senior Muslim clerics said Thursday that an Afghan man on trial for converting from Islam to Christianity should be killed regardless of whether a court decides to free him.
... "He is not crazy. He went in front of the media and confessed to being a Christian," said Hamidullah, chief cleric at Haji Yacob Mosque.
... "He is not mad. The government are playing games. The people will not be fooled," said Abdul Raoulf, cleric at Herati Mosque. "This is humiliating for Islam. ... Cut off his head."
Raoulf is considered a moderate cleric in Afghanistan.
So? Are we going to call them on this barbarity, or keep our fingers in our ears?
By the way, guys, I tracked you back and it seems not to be working. Other bloggers hither and yon are getting out the word on Abdul Rahman, the Afghani in peril of execution for becoming Christian.
The West is not to blame for this - at least, not in the sense that we're the ones holding Rahman in a cell, trying to decide whether he is fit to be killed or just crazy for leaving Islam. Luckily some people are doing all that can be done. I will be calling myself. But outside the blogworld I see a lot of blasé about it all.
Try to follow me here.
I was angered when some fool decided to dunk a crucifix in a pot of piss and call it art - and used my money to pay for it all. It was meant as an insult and taken as an insult. But that is not persecution. Nobody was killed or jailed. Now we have the real thing. It deserves a stronger response from the civilized world, and yet all I hear (officially) is a nancy-boy Official Statement about "respecting personal freedom" and "raising the case" with the proper authorities.
In other words, we are so caught up with our own little niceties that we are missing the big picture. We can't storm the jail and free him by force - but why can't we openly condemn this act? Why can't the President say, "We didn't pound on the Taliban so you could act just like them." The blogworld is up in arms, and thank God, but where are the self-approved social bellweathers?
Susan Sarandon is arm-in-arm with Cindy Sheehan, and will shortly be portraying her on-screen. George Clooney is bravely accepting awards for opposing Joseph McCarthy, who's been dead nearly fifty years. I bring them up not to have a go at Hollywood-bashing but to raise a point - the real red-letter moment in Edward Murrow's campaign against McCarthy wasn't that a dangerous fascist was finally brought to account. In fact, McCarthy's accusations have turned out to be accurate, and the Soviet Union really HAD infiltrated many levels of the US Government. Murrow, however, succeeded in making the image the message. McCarthy was also a demagogue and a bully - at least, the parts of him that Murrow and CBS chose to exhibit. Because of this, his warnings were discredited as well.
By and large, the West has fallen for image over substance ever since. So, when the Piss Christ and the Danish cartoons are set side-by-side, there is a certain parallel appearance, so the media stop there - but the Christian reaction to the one is peaceful protest, and the Muslim reaction to the other is rioting and pillaging. This suggests that the Piss Christ is a lot less accurate than the Mohammed Bomb Turban; it also suggests that the surface similarity ends the instant anyone tries to find supporting evidence.
But that brings us back, full circle, to the tepid protest from our government. We are, quite simply, afraid that this will be another Cartoon Moment, and that a strong protest will get Muslims tossing rocks and decrying the new Crusade descending on their shores. We are so afraid of it, in fact, that we go out of our way to fail to mention certain inconvenient truths. Ironically, let's let a blogger named Crusader drop the clue: He quotes an article where a neighbor of Rahman's describes why he was turned in.
"For 30 years, we have fought religious wars in this country and there is no way we are going to allow an Afghan to insult us by becoming Christian," said Mohammed Jan, 38, who lives opposite Rahman's father, Abdul Manan, in Kabul. "This has brought so much shame."
This guy neglects to notice that it was his side launching those wars, and is more insulted by the conversion than he is by the great swaths of fellow Muslims who endorse or carry out murders, honor rapes and killings, tyrannies, ethnic warfare, and too many other brutalities to mention. Meanwhile, the man who has done this "shameful" thing has also left behind all the things in the current Muslim world that pass for virtue, things they don't bother hiding.
Only a willfully blind society could hear the open declaration of hostility and the stated motives and yet bend over backwards to deny both the motive and the hostility. Why else wouldn't you believe the chants, the deeds, and the open declarations? Maybe people think we're being nice about it, trying to prove our tolerance and fairness. In doing so, we prove that we aren't fair at all, since we're not willing to stand up for fair treatment of ourselves.
But in the long run, honesty is much less insulting. This inability to admit what we see every day says that we don't take the enemy seriously - that we don't even take them seriously enough to use the word "enemy." On some level we watch the demonstrations and burning cars and intifada and say, "Isn't that cute? They're being international!" Then we set them up at a kiddie card table in the UN and treat them with a legitimacy they value only as a strategic asset in their continuing aggressions.
In effect, we're doing to them what was done to McCarthy - we miss the substance of what is said because we're distracted by non-essentials. We're trying to appear equal instead of working toward actual equality.
An open condemnation of religious persecution would say that we think of the new Afghanistan as a liberated country of adults who can handle a little criticism maturely. Ironically, they're the ones dealing with us as adults - "We want to kill you and make our religion pre-eminent on Earth, by force" - and we are too childish to admit it.
double update - March 23, 1:12 pm - from MSNBC (w/t to the Coalition): Senior Muslim clerics said Thursday that an Afghan man on trial for converting from Islam to Christianity should be killed regardless of whether a court decides to free him.
... "He is not crazy. He went in front of the media and confessed to being a Christian," said Hamidullah, chief cleric at Haji Yacob Mosque.
... "He is not mad. The government are playing games. The people will not be fooled," said Abdul Raoulf, cleric at Herati Mosque. "This is humiliating for Islam. ... Cut off his head."
Raoulf is considered a moderate cleric in Afghanistan.
So? Are we going to call them on this barbarity, or keep our fingers in our ears?
Mr. Clutch vs. Not So Much
Ladies and gentlemen of weak disposition, sit down before you read the next four words.
Adam Viniateri, Indianapolis Colt.
Peyton has got a smile wider than that kick Mike Vanderjagt honked against Pittsburgh in the playoffs. The Village Idiot of kickers has been replaced by a guy who won two Super Bowls with last-minute field goals. Without him, Tom Brady is a talented young guy who may soon break through to stardom - no glamorous supermodel dates, no Five Layers of Protection, and no Bill Belicheck, Sooper Geeenius. Peyton probably signed on to wash Viniateri's car for the next six years - with a toothbrush. "Wanna go to Sonic, Adam? How about doing a Gatorade spot with me? Sit next to me on the team bus, won't you Adam? Huh? Huh? Awright!"
And for this to happen in New England? This is like the Return of the Curse. If you're a hockey guy, you remember how wrong it seemed that Bryan Trottier, Islanders Hall-of-Famer, coached the Rangers... It was so wrong that Isles and Rangers fans AGREED it was wrong. Well, this is about as bad. The only thing possibly worse than this in New England would be if Larry Bird, before Game Seven at the Garden, whonked Kevin McHale with a folding chair and then stripped his warmups to reveal a Lakers jersey. Then picture him standing at center court, right on the Blessed Leprechaun, flexing and mugging with Kareem while Johnny Most howled "NOOOOO! This isn't happening! Somebody stop this!"
Adam Viniateri, Indianapolis Colt? The hell, you say. April Fool's must be a week early.
Adam Viniateri, Indianapolis Colt.
Peyton has got a smile wider than that kick Mike Vanderjagt honked against Pittsburgh in the playoffs. The Village Idiot of kickers has been replaced by a guy who won two Super Bowls with last-minute field goals. Without him, Tom Brady is a talented young guy who may soon break through to stardom - no glamorous supermodel dates, no Five Layers of Protection, and no Bill Belicheck, Sooper Geeenius. Peyton probably signed on to wash Viniateri's car for the next six years - with a toothbrush. "Wanna go to Sonic, Adam? How about doing a Gatorade spot with me? Sit next to me on the team bus, won't you Adam? Huh? Huh? Awright!"
And for this to happen in New England? This is like the Return of the Curse. If you're a hockey guy, you remember how wrong it seemed that Bryan Trottier, Islanders Hall-of-Famer, coached the Rangers... It was so wrong that Isles and Rangers fans AGREED it was wrong. Well, this is about as bad. The only thing possibly worse than this in New England would be if Larry Bird, before Game Seven at the Garden, whonked Kevin McHale with a folding chair and then stripped his warmups to reveal a Lakers jersey. Then picture him standing at center court, right on the Blessed Leprechaun, flexing and mugging with Kareem while Johnny Most howled "NOOOOO! This isn't happening! Somebody stop this!"
Adam Viniateri, Indianapolis Colt? The hell, you say. April Fool's must be a week early.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Right post, wrong daily QB
Though I sometimes link Mr. Gregg Easterbrook's Tuesday Morning Quarterback, I am no player of favorites among days of the week. Peter King's Monday Morning Quarterback is also a fun read, and unlike TMQ, he posts during the off-season as well.
This week I got to him a day late, and the final item of his "Ten Things I Think I Think" caught my eye. Specifically, #10-B: So I didn't follow college basketball this year at all, but I'm like everybody else: I wanted to fill out a bracket... I woke up Thursday morning, knowledge-less, and said, "I've got to get a bracket filled out here. What do I do?''
He tuned in to sports radio, listened closely to the show's guest, former coach Fran Fraschilla, and cribbed heavily.
Well, it turned out about as badly as did my own entry in the Big Al Annual Five-Dollar Disappointment at work. Personally, I knew I was hosed when I saw Sports Guy's bracket and realized that two of his four regionals were nearly identical to mine. Whenever our football picks coincide we usually drag each other down to the bottom, so I was cringing most of the first round. (I hit 23 of 32, not terrible, but that just got me to unclench enough to watch my brackets go bye-bye on Saturday. In fact, I did marginally better than Simmons, who lost one of his Final Four about three hours into the tournament. We shall now light each other on fire.)
Oh - back to Mr. King. This sentence shot out as I read: In the Washington, D.C., regional, Fraschilla is bullish on Seton Hall. ... I'm listening to Fraschilla, and saying, "Seton Hall? Are you high? They lost to Rutgers -- TWICE -- and to DePaul, and to Richmond, Northwestern and St. John's.'' But OK, I dutifully fill in Seton Hall for two wins.
I could have told him that it could only end in tears. Scroll down to comment number three. And Mr. King, next time, I promise I'll post it here as well so we can both avoid embarrassment; for unlike you, who trusted expert opinion, I wrote that reply and STILL took the Hall in the opening game. I shall now jump off a tall fixed point, face-first.
This week I got to him a day late, and the final item of his "Ten Things I Think I Think" caught my eye. Specifically, #10-B: So I didn't follow college basketball this year at all, but I'm like everybody else: I wanted to fill out a bracket... I woke up Thursday morning, knowledge-less, and said, "I've got to get a bracket filled out here. What do I do?''
He tuned in to sports radio, listened closely to the show's guest, former coach Fran Fraschilla, and cribbed heavily.
Well, it turned out about as badly as did my own entry in the Big Al Annual Five-Dollar Disappointment at work. Personally, I knew I was hosed when I saw Sports Guy's bracket and realized that two of his four regionals were nearly identical to mine. Whenever our football picks coincide we usually drag each other down to the bottom, so I was cringing most of the first round. (I hit 23 of 32, not terrible, but that just got me to unclench enough to watch my brackets go bye-bye on Saturday. In fact, I did marginally better than Simmons, who lost one of his Final Four about three hours into the tournament. We shall now light each other on fire.)
Oh - back to Mr. King. This sentence shot out as I read: In the Washington, D.C., regional, Fraschilla is bullish on Seton Hall. ... I'm listening to Fraschilla, and saying, "Seton Hall? Are you high? They lost to Rutgers -- TWICE -- and to DePaul, and to Richmond, Northwestern and St. John's.'' But OK, I dutifully fill in Seton Hall for two wins.
I could have told him that it could only end in tears. Scroll down to comment number three. And Mr. King, next time, I promise I'll post it here as well so we can both avoid embarrassment; for unlike you, who trusted expert opinion, I wrote that reply and STILL took the Hall in the opening game. I shall now jump off a tall fixed point, face-first.
Monday, March 20, 2006
A blast from my past
Usually my first online stop is the Coalition of the Swilling. (Surprise, surprise, right?)
Well, today's first stop reminded me of my own first stop - way back on September 30, 2004. Compare and contrast:
The DNC seems to be living out the old joke: "Sincerity is everything. Learn to fake that and you've got it made."
Well, today's first stop reminded me of my own first stop - way back on September 30, 2004. Compare and contrast:
THS, 3/20/06: "Doesn't It Just Suck... to have to deal with people you so thoroughly despise?"
NF, 9/30/04: "Tonight's debate is the first in a three-game series, and Kerry's counting on his Yale-honed debating skills to make up a few points in the standings. My personal experience in school was that the 'champion debaters' were the ones who best aped the favored opinions of their instructors. Trying that approach may surprise him here; appealing to those whom he naturally disdains (AKA us) is difficult for him."
The DNC seems to be living out the old joke: "Sincerity is everything. Learn to fake that and you've got it made."
Friday, March 17, 2006
In no particular order
...for Lent, I chose to give up my impatience with other drivers. It's not going that badly, but there's room for improvement. As is usual in such cases, I had no idea exactly how much junk I had to spare.
...the Coalition folks have been mentioning this event off and on. That's not the only reason that I recognized the name "Oriskany."
The details of the good ship Oriskany are here. You can also read about the New York town it's named for, and where the town's name came from, and all sorts of other fun.
...and speaking of fun - here's the post that started it all. It kept on into May, and kicked up from time to time afterward.
...during the actual hustle and bustle of the weekend, there's one thing I didn't mention here, publicly: Happy Birthday, Ladybug! And since me bonnie lass is a Seahawks fan, I'd like to extend belated congratulations to Seattle's Shaun Alexander for his big payday. Not bad for a guy who went #19 overall, but he earned it. As TMQ would say, it's pleasant to be paid $62 million to run past people who have been knocked to the ground.
...Faux Sports Dept. - I'm enjoying NHL '06, but there are some frustrations. For one, the goalies were turned from supermen into flounders. Oh, the goals I've seen. Keepers used to block incoming shots like Jedi Knights; now they dive out of the way as if they were allergic to the rubber. But the biggest is the system where the staff and owners email you all the time.
It's always dumb stuff, which would be OK if it were realistic dumb stuff, but my coaches don't seem to notice what actually happens in the game. For example, you have 15 different areas that you can spend money on to improve, so my coaches tell me that I have to upgrade them - but they either pick ones that I've just upgraded or that I can't upgrade any more.
And can I, the GM, fire these dunderheads? Hells no.
And the owner is worse. Wow, unrealistic demands from an owner! Just like real life! Well, no. First, is that the kind of realism a gamer wants? Second - owners want to turn profit and win the Cup, right? Fine. But the owner also gives you tasks like "finish first overall in the regular season" or "have the league's leader in goals scored."
Sorry, boss. In the game I've won four straight Cups, and this past season one of our forwards did in fact lead the league in scoring: goals + assists. But his goal total alone fell three short, so the owner threatened to fire me.
Can I, the GM, quit and find better work? Nope. And if fired, I can't join another team, but am forced to start over. It's the reverse of the Hotel California: I can leave any time I like, but I can't check in. My only recourse is the off switch. Click.
...and finally, happy St. Pat's Day to all and sundry. Enjoy that dispensation! Or, if not, rememeber that you can pop that Guinness regardless. Bishops may wear funny hats, but it don't mean they don't have something going on underneath them.
...the Coalition folks have been mentioning this event off and on. That's not the only reason that I recognized the name "Oriskany."
The details of the good ship Oriskany are here. You can also read about the New York town it's named for, and where the town's name came from, and all sorts of other fun.
...and speaking of fun - here's the post that started it all. It kept on into May, and kicked up from time to time afterward.
...during the actual hustle and bustle of the weekend, there's one thing I didn't mention here, publicly: Happy Birthday, Ladybug! And since me bonnie lass is a Seahawks fan, I'd like to extend belated congratulations to Seattle's Shaun Alexander for his big payday. Not bad for a guy who went #19 overall, but he earned it. As TMQ would say, it's pleasant to be paid $62 million to run past people who have been knocked to the ground.
...Faux Sports Dept. - I'm enjoying NHL '06, but there are some frustrations. For one, the goalies were turned from supermen into flounders. Oh, the goals I've seen. Keepers used to block incoming shots like Jedi Knights; now they dive out of the way as if they were allergic to the rubber. But the biggest is the system where the staff and owners email you all the time.
It's always dumb stuff, which would be OK if it were realistic dumb stuff, but my coaches don't seem to notice what actually happens in the game. For example, you have 15 different areas that you can spend money on to improve, so my coaches tell me that I have to upgrade them - but they either pick ones that I've just upgraded or that I can't upgrade any more.
And can I, the GM, fire these dunderheads? Hells no.
And the owner is worse. Wow, unrealistic demands from an owner! Just like real life! Well, no. First, is that the kind of realism a gamer wants? Second - owners want to turn profit and win the Cup, right? Fine. But the owner also gives you tasks like "finish first overall in the regular season" or "have the league's leader in goals scored."
Sorry, boss. In the game I've won four straight Cups, and this past season one of our forwards did in fact lead the league in scoring: goals + assists. But his goal total alone fell three short, so the owner threatened to fire me.
Can I, the GM, quit and find better work? Nope. And if fired, I can't join another team, but am forced to start over. It's the reverse of the Hotel California: I can leave any time I like, but I can't check in. My only recourse is the off switch. Click.
...and finally, happy St. Pat's Day to all and sundry. Enjoy that dispensation! Or, if not, rememeber that you can pop that Guinness regardless. Bishops may wear funny hats, but it don't mean they don't have something going on underneath them.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Load of hooey, print edition
Here's a flaming turd from Matt Zoller Seitz of the Newark Star-Ledger.
His target is ostensibly "American Inventor," an Idol-esque show designed to give One! Million! Dollars! to the winner of an amateur inventor contest. He doesn't like it, and moreso because Simon Cowell is the behind-the-scenes brainchild.
Well, fine. He's entitled to spell out every flaw he sees. But this line caught my eye: "I despise both these shows for their essentially undemocratic spirit, which puts an ugly bait-and-switch at the heart of their formats."
This is laughable. Undemocratic? America votes on the winner of Idol. America even votes on Idol itself, via their remotes and TiVos. And on top of that, once the CDs hit the racks, they vote with their wallets. The whole process is so democratic that it even has voter fraud, with groups dedicated to machinations worthy of Tammany Hall or Richard Daley's Chicago.
But read on and it becomes clear what Seitz's problem really is.
Translation - Simon is a big meanie!
Well, my response is, who exactly is Matt Zoller Seitz? Answer - a big-media television critic who is paid to give intelligent opinions on the watchability of an entire slate of TV shows. Simon, Randy, and Paula are a panel of judges paid to do exactly what Seitz does, with one key difference - they are all recording industry veterans. Simon, in fact, is a high school dropout who started in the mail room at EMI and worked his way up to producing. What has Seitz done except professionally complain about other people's hard work? This? Well - maybe; click the title and "Matt Seitz" comes up as the writer of the piece. That leads you here. Same guy? If so, a 'thanks' in the credits of Chasing Amy makes for slender cover. This is a thimble calling an industrial cauldron 'black.'
Besides which, Seitz routinely rips stuff he doesn't like, more often than Randy or Paula tend to. As for Simon - given the great variety of shower-stall voices he hears weekly, it's not surprising that he is willing to say so. If I were an Idolist, I'd rather hear Simon tell me that I'm flat and ghastly than hear Randy blow sunshine up my porthole. (In fact, I had a dream where Simon did precisely that. I asked, "What should I do?" He shot back, "Produce." And I immediately turned to Ryan Seacrest and said, "OK, you're fired." I wish I were that quick-witted when I'm awake.)
Besides, Idol has not only launched Kelly Clarkson, Carrie Underwood, and Clay Aiken. William Hung made a CD and went on tour! Even non-fans of the show have seen "She Bangs." It was the musical equivalent of Howard Dean's "I Have a Scream" speech - yet Dean's presidential candidacy fell in smoking ruins. Hung? Eh, he's doing all right.
Seitz doesn't like Idol, it's his business. But give us a real reason - or admit that it's a matter of taste. "Undemocratic"? What hypocrisy.
His target is ostensibly "American Inventor," an Idol-esque show designed to give One! Million! Dollars! to the winner of an amateur inventor contest. He doesn't like it, and moreso because Simon Cowell is the behind-the-scenes brainchild.
Well, fine. He's entitled to spell out every flaw he sees. But this line caught my eye: "I despise both these shows for their essentially undemocratic spirit, which puts an ugly bait-and-switch at the heart of their formats."
This is laughable. Undemocratic? America votes on the winner of Idol. America even votes on Idol itself, via their remotes and TiVos. And on top of that, once the CDs hit the racks, they vote with their wallets. The whole process is so democratic that it even has voter fraud, with groups dedicated to machinations worthy of Tammany Hall or Richard Daley's Chicago.
But read on and it becomes clear what Seitz's problem really is.
"Idol's recipe for popular success is more or less photocopied here: Praise the ideal of America-as-land-of-opportunity, draw anonymous dreamers into the audition room and let them do their thing, then send most of them away wishing they'd never been born."
"Both "Idol" and "Inventors" make a big deal out of giving average folks a chance to bypass the cruelly indifferent big media gatekeepers, then they substitute a different bunch of big-media-employed gatekeepers who insult you on TV instead of through a form letter."
Translation - Simon is a big meanie!
Well, my response is, who exactly is Matt Zoller Seitz? Answer - a big-media television critic who is paid to give intelligent opinions on the watchability of an entire slate of TV shows. Simon, Randy, and Paula are a panel of judges paid to do exactly what Seitz does, with one key difference - they are all recording industry veterans. Simon, in fact, is a high school dropout who started in the mail room at EMI and worked his way up to producing. What has Seitz done except professionally complain about other people's hard work? This? Well - maybe; click the title and "Matt Seitz" comes up as the writer of the piece. That leads you here. Same guy? If so, a 'thanks' in the credits of Chasing Amy makes for slender cover. This is a thimble calling an industrial cauldron 'black.'
Besides which, Seitz routinely rips stuff he doesn't like, more often than Randy or Paula tend to. As for Simon - given the great variety of shower-stall voices he hears weekly, it's not surprising that he is willing to say so. If I were an Idolist, I'd rather hear Simon tell me that I'm flat and ghastly than hear Randy blow sunshine up my porthole. (In fact, I had a dream where Simon did precisely that. I asked, "What should I do?" He shot back, "Produce." And I immediately turned to Ryan Seacrest and said, "OK, you're fired." I wish I were that quick-witted when I'm awake.)
Besides, Idol has not only launched Kelly Clarkson, Carrie Underwood, and Clay Aiken. William Hung made a CD and went on tour! Even non-fans of the show have seen "She Bangs." It was the musical equivalent of Howard Dean's "I Have a Scream" speech - yet Dean's presidential candidacy fell in smoking ruins. Hung? Eh, he's doing all right.
Seitz doesn't like Idol, it's his business. But give us a real reason - or admit that it's a matter of taste. "Undemocratic"? What hypocrisy.
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
Giant sucking sound
This doesn't surprise me. This is why:
Well, would it be a tremendous accomplishment? Was it a tremendous accomplishment when Nykesha Sales set the women's scoring record at UConn? She took great heat for it, in fact, because she had wrecked her knee the previous game, ending her senior season just one point short of the record. Her next opponents allowed her an uncontested layup to set the mark, and then UConn let them score uncontested to make it 2-2, and then they started playing for real.
Now, if I were the previous record holder, I'd have wondered why they had bothered to honor the mark I'd set honestly if they were just going to conspire with an opponent to give it away - especially since that new mark is bound to fall sometime. (The actual previous holder, Ms. Kerry Bascom, signed off on the plan. And contrary to that article, Ms. Sales played 17 MORE games than Ms. Bascom, not the reverse. It's all in the media guide. [PDF link])
It's simple - "tremendous accomplishment" implies that one had to work to achieve it. What has Bonds accomplished by cheating his way to a mark that Hank Aaron came by honestly? One he came by, in fact, at considerable risk to his safety? Aaron received thousands of death threats for daring to break a mark held by a white man. Now baseball is going to spit in that man's face? How is this different from hitting "reset" in Madden when you're about to lose the Super Bowl? Seriously - Bonds and the Giants can cram it with walnuts. I don't care if steroids wasn't officially banned until 2003, or that Bonds filled seats and moved merchandise. The Giants and he cheated and profited grossly from it, and continue to do so, and it is grotesque.
This is how you do it, folks. Notice that they had to sneak behind Mr. Haasis' back, and once he found out, he wanted no part of it, because cheating is beneath a true competitor. (And no, I don't consider Mike Strahan the single-season record-holder for sacks, because of Favre's monkey business. That should have gone down in the official scoring as a rush, loss of four yards.) Bonds isn't worthy to carry this kid's gear bag to the team bus.
The Giants have already sold about 2.5 million tickets, nearly the same number as last season at this time. [Team owner Peter] Magowan isn't concerned about a fallout from the steroids reports, saying: "I'm pretty confident. I think we know our fans pretty well and the fans like Barry and they show up to see him perform. I suspect they will again."
Well, would it be a tremendous accomplishment? Was it a tremendous accomplishment when Nykesha Sales set the women's scoring record at UConn? She took great heat for it, in fact, because she had wrecked her knee the previous game, ending her senior season just one point short of the record. Her next opponents allowed her an uncontested layup to set the mark, and then UConn let them score uncontested to make it 2-2, and then they started playing for real.
Now, if I were the previous record holder, I'd have wondered why they had bothered to honor the mark I'd set honestly if they were just going to conspire with an opponent to give it away - especially since that new mark is bound to fall sometime. (The actual previous holder, Ms. Kerry Bascom, signed off on the plan. And contrary to that article, Ms. Sales played 17 MORE games than Ms. Bascom, not the reverse. It's all in the media guide. [PDF link])
It's simple - "tremendous accomplishment" implies that one had to work to achieve it. What has Bonds accomplished by cheating his way to a mark that Hank Aaron came by honestly? One he came by, in fact, at considerable risk to his safety? Aaron received thousands of death threats for daring to break a mark held by a white man. Now baseball is going to spit in that man's face? How is this different from hitting "reset" in Madden when you're about to lose the Super Bowl? Seriously - Bonds and the Giants can cram it with walnuts. I don't care if steroids wasn't officially banned until 2003, or that Bonds filled seats and moved merchandise. The Giants and he cheated and profited grossly from it, and continue to do so, and it is grotesque.
This is how you do it, folks. Notice that they had to sneak behind Mr. Haasis' back, and once he found out, he wanted no part of it, because cheating is beneath a true competitor. (And no, I don't consider Mike Strahan the single-season record-holder for sacks, because of Favre's monkey business. That should have gone down in the official scoring as a rush, loss of four yards.) Bonds isn't worthy to carry this kid's gear bag to the team bus.
Friday, March 10, 2006
Feast days on Fridays always get me down...
Via the Coalition, concerning St. Pat's and Lenten observance. On Fridays during Lent, Catholics share a pretty simple sacrifice - we all forego meat. (I'm eating a little pasta primavera even as we speak.) Then on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday, we also fast.*
These aren't very hard to do. Fridays used to be meatless for the whole year, until the Church decided to relax that particular discipline. The idea remains the same, though - the mortification of physical desires is meant to make us mindful of the One who gives good gifts, and make us appreciate them (and Him) more. It's Biblical basis is the Temptation of Jesus in the desert.
Not everyone digs it.
...you need some authority extraneous to the Bible to tell you what's moral and what isn't?
Two errors, here. First, the authority of the Church is not extraneous to the Bible but contained therein, most specifically where Jesus tells Peter that he will build His Church on him (Matthew 16:18-20). In general, it's hard to picture Christ wasting His time in building a Church that had no function. Ah, but aren't we all the body of Christ, and therefore the Church? Yes. Exactly so. We are all of a piece, not individual units but pieces of a large, intricate puzzle.
This brings us to the second objection, that the Church (meaning, just the clergy) is telling us what's moral. In this case, the thing in question is the corporate worship of God's people - what they do together to observe the Forty Days before Easter Sunday. Individually, of course, you're free to do as you like in addition, according to your conscience - "What did you give up for Lent?" (I gave up chewing out other motorists, to cultivate more charity and patience. Ironic, right?) But together, there has to be some sort of consensus, and it does legitimately fall to the clergy to help organize it - that's why they're here. ("What you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven.") God deals with us as a body, a people, not solely as unconnected persons, so it is fitting that we offer something to Him in the same manner. If nothing else, it shows that we're trying to look at ourselves the way He Himself designed us to be.
To revisit the first objection - do we need a moral authority? It's like asking if we need human nature. We have it already. That's how we're made. On the spiritual level, well, we ARE a Church, like it or not, and the shepherds of that Church by necessity have to have some authority if we are to intelligently and coherently live as one body in Christ.
An authority that doesn't participate in the most vital function in society (family life)?
This puzzles me greatly. Priests didn't grow up with mothers, fathers, siblings? Were they grown in pods? Further, some eastern Catholic rites do permit married clergy. It's a discipline, not a doctrine, and can be changed at discretion.**
An authority that covers up heinous crap within their own ranks?
Well - let the guilty be punished. There's no question what happened in Boston (and dozens of other parishes) was heinous. But to declare that therefore everything the Church says must be wrong is akin to saying that math must be bunk because one can't do a sum. "They sit in the seat of Moses - do as they say, but do not follow their example," to paraphrase the opening of Matthew 23. And this makes sense. Nixon covered up Watergate - does that mean that we should stop electing Presidents? Teachers have been known to seduce underage students - should we shutter every schoolhouse in the state? Of course not, but people think that such a standard should apply to the clergy - and that assumption itself demonstrates that they are not merely some helpful extra, but serve an intrinsic role in our life and worship.†
WTF do they know about life?
The clergy obviously know more than they get credit for. St. Pat's day is a huge cultural celebration to all Americans, not just Catholics (Irish or not), and so the clergy have made provision to permit celebrations to go forward as is customary. St. Joseph's Day celebrates a more important figure than Patrick: Mary's husband, foster father to Our Lord and Savior. In the order of the Church that would call for a bigger party (and I daresay that St. Patrick himself would agree - Joseph is every Catholic's patron saint at least three times). But when San Guiseppe falls on Friday, you don't get nearly the fuss because that feast day isn't a cultural phenomenon. The Church accordingly takes a different approach.
They can take their dispensation and stick it - if I'm doing something wrong, I'll take it up with the Lord myself on Judgement Day - and if I am doing something wrong, who are they to make it right with some BS penance?
Wow. I'll simply chalk this up to frustration, because it's not at all close to Christian thought no matter how you slice it.
First - if I'm doing something wrong, I'd much prefer to take it up with the Lord long before I have the final reckoning. Why would any Christian want to spend forty or more years continually screwing up? St. Paul has so many admonitions about living according to the spirit and being a new creation that it's astonishing that anyone could let this statement pass the same lips that profess the faith of Jesus Christ.
Second - we've already established "who are they to make it right" - they are the shepherds of the people of God chosen by Christ. It is their job to offer guidance on moral choices. We still have to decide how that applies to us personally, but it is no light matter to presume that a common observance is not binding on us individually. Do people decide to scrap the Book of Common Prayer for no reason? For that matter, do people decide to scrap the Book Itself? Lenten observance is a small example of the larger pattern of living as a single people called to the Lord, with a particular way of conducting ourselves in concert. ‡
I won't quibble with other denominations' forms of collective worship. The issue here is the casual assumption that, if it doesn't suit one's personal tastes, that one can choose to ignore one's brothers and sisters - acting as a discouragement and obstacle to them in word and example. We all do things in a family that we don't prefer in order to show that the family itself is more important than our whim of the moment.
This may not be a whim to some people observing from the outside. Fair enough - we all find issues worth mounting the ramparts for. All I ask is recognition of the reverse, that it's no whim to us either, and that there may be larger issues than whether corned beef is a vegetable for Lenten purposes. (Besides, as the Coalition well know, the meat of the meal is poured, not carved.)
* And by fast, I don't mean "eat nothing." The Church has loosened the definition considerably; healthy adult Catholics are asked to limit themselves to one full meal. And ill health, age, youth, or medical standing (pregnancy, for example) would confer automatic dispensation. It's not like we're trying to clear an impossibly high bar.
** For that matter, fast and abstinence are also discipline, not doctrine, and can be changed at discretion - but that discretion doesn't lie in the whim of the individual believer any more than the individual seminarian can decide to go to the drive-thru chapel before ordination.
† We can also get into another Coalition discussion here, on forgiveness. Unquestionably pedophilia among priests is a graver sin than most of us face. But if we then decide that we deserve forgiveness more readily than they because of our venial faults, are we asking forgiveness or trying to justify ourselves apart from God's mercy? Also remember that forgiveness doesn't preclude punishment for those faults - in fact, true repentance for the sinner involves restitution, i.e. turning oneself in for a lengthy jail term, even as the Church's repentance is involving a good deal of paying settlements and submitting to lay review, all welcome developments.
‡ "Concert" is intentionally chosen - we in the body are meant to operate like an orchestra, each playing its own part with individual excellence, but also in cooperation and not competition with the other parts. The violins must not only play on key, but must not drown out the oboes; and the second viola can't suddenly decide to break out with "Devil Went Down to Georgia" halfway through the Beethoven. Like them, we have a written score (the Bible) and a conductor (the clergy), and neither can be dispensed with.
These aren't very hard to do. Fridays used to be meatless for the whole year, until the Church decided to relax that particular discipline. The idea remains the same, though - the mortification of physical desires is meant to make us mindful of the One who gives good gifts, and make us appreciate them (and Him) more. It's Biblical basis is the Temptation of Jesus in the desert.
Not everyone digs it.
That's what I don't get about Catholicism - you need some authority extraneous to the Bible to tell you what's moral and what isn't? An authority that doesn't participate in the most vital function in society (family life)? An authority that covers up heinous crap within their own ranks? WTF do they know about life? They can take their dispensation and stick it - if I'm doing something wrong, I'll take it up with the Lord myself on Judgement Day - and if I am doing something wrong, who are they to make it right with some BS penance?John's welcome to his opinion, and to urge all and sundry to go Protestant. But it's only fair to point out that in this case, most of the opinion is based on misapprehension.
...you need some authority extraneous to the Bible to tell you what's moral and what isn't?
Two errors, here. First, the authority of the Church is not extraneous to the Bible but contained therein, most specifically where Jesus tells Peter that he will build His Church on him (Matthew 16:18-20). In general, it's hard to picture Christ wasting His time in building a Church that had no function. Ah, but aren't we all the body of Christ, and therefore the Church? Yes. Exactly so. We are all of a piece, not individual units but pieces of a large, intricate puzzle.
This brings us to the second objection, that the Church (meaning, just the clergy) is telling us what's moral. In this case, the thing in question is the corporate worship of God's people - what they do together to observe the Forty Days before Easter Sunday. Individually, of course, you're free to do as you like in addition, according to your conscience - "What did you give up for Lent?" (I gave up chewing out other motorists, to cultivate more charity and patience. Ironic, right?) But together, there has to be some sort of consensus, and it does legitimately fall to the clergy to help organize it - that's why they're here. ("What you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven.") God deals with us as a body, a people, not solely as unconnected persons, so it is fitting that we offer something to Him in the same manner. If nothing else, it shows that we're trying to look at ourselves the way He Himself designed us to be.
To revisit the first objection - do we need a moral authority? It's like asking if we need human nature. We have it already. That's how we're made. On the spiritual level, well, we ARE a Church, like it or not, and the shepherds of that Church by necessity have to have some authority if we are to intelligently and coherently live as one body in Christ.
An authority that doesn't participate in the most vital function in society (family life)?
This puzzles me greatly. Priests didn't grow up with mothers, fathers, siblings? Were they grown in pods? Further, some eastern Catholic rites do permit married clergy. It's a discipline, not a doctrine, and can be changed at discretion.**
An authority that covers up heinous crap within their own ranks?
Well - let the guilty be punished. There's no question what happened in Boston (and dozens of other parishes) was heinous. But to declare that therefore everything the Church says must be wrong is akin to saying that math must be bunk because one can't do a sum. "They sit in the seat of Moses - do as they say, but do not follow their example," to paraphrase the opening of Matthew 23. And this makes sense. Nixon covered up Watergate - does that mean that we should stop electing Presidents? Teachers have been known to seduce underage students - should we shutter every schoolhouse in the state? Of course not, but people think that such a standard should apply to the clergy - and that assumption itself demonstrates that they are not merely some helpful extra, but serve an intrinsic role in our life and worship.†
WTF do they know about life?
The clergy obviously know more than they get credit for. St. Pat's day is a huge cultural celebration to all Americans, not just Catholics (Irish or not), and so the clergy have made provision to permit celebrations to go forward as is customary. St. Joseph's Day celebrates a more important figure than Patrick: Mary's husband, foster father to Our Lord and Savior. In the order of the Church that would call for a bigger party (and I daresay that St. Patrick himself would agree - Joseph is every Catholic's patron saint at least three times). But when San Guiseppe falls on Friday, you don't get nearly the fuss because that feast day isn't a cultural phenomenon. The Church accordingly takes a different approach.
They can take their dispensation and stick it - if I'm doing something wrong, I'll take it up with the Lord myself on Judgement Day - and if I am doing something wrong, who are they to make it right with some BS penance?
Wow. I'll simply chalk this up to frustration, because it's not at all close to Christian thought no matter how you slice it.
First - if I'm doing something wrong, I'd much prefer to take it up with the Lord long before I have the final reckoning. Why would any Christian want to spend forty or more years continually screwing up? St. Paul has so many admonitions about living according to the spirit and being a new creation that it's astonishing that anyone could let this statement pass the same lips that profess the faith of Jesus Christ.
Second - we've already established "who are they to make it right" - they are the shepherds of the people of God chosen by Christ. It is their job to offer guidance on moral choices. We still have to decide how that applies to us personally, but it is no light matter to presume that a common observance is not binding on us individually. Do people decide to scrap the Book of Common Prayer for no reason? For that matter, do people decide to scrap the Book Itself? Lenten observance is a small example of the larger pattern of living as a single people called to the Lord, with a particular way of conducting ourselves in concert. ‡
I won't quibble with other denominations' forms of collective worship. The issue here is the casual assumption that, if it doesn't suit one's personal tastes, that one can choose to ignore one's brothers and sisters - acting as a discouragement and obstacle to them in word and example. We all do things in a family that we don't prefer in order to show that the family itself is more important than our whim of the moment.
This may not be a whim to some people observing from the outside. Fair enough - we all find issues worth mounting the ramparts for. All I ask is recognition of the reverse, that it's no whim to us either, and that there may be larger issues than whether corned beef is a vegetable for Lenten purposes. (Besides, as the Coalition well know, the meat of the meal is poured, not carved.)
* And by fast, I don't mean "eat nothing." The Church has loosened the definition considerably; healthy adult Catholics are asked to limit themselves to one full meal. And ill health, age, youth, or medical standing (pregnancy, for example) would confer automatic dispensation. It's not like we're trying to clear an impossibly high bar.
** For that matter, fast and abstinence are also discipline, not doctrine, and can be changed at discretion - but that discretion doesn't lie in the whim of the individual believer any more than the individual seminarian can decide to go to the drive-thru chapel before ordination.
† We can also get into another Coalition discussion here, on forgiveness. Unquestionably pedophilia among priests is a graver sin than most of us face. But if we then decide that we deserve forgiveness more readily than they because of our venial faults, are we asking forgiveness or trying to justify ourselves apart from God's mercy? Also remember that forgiveness doesn't preclude punishment for those faults - in fact, true repentance for the sinner involves restitution, i.e. turning oneself in for a lengthy jail term, even as the Church's repentance is involving a good deal of paying settlements and submitting to lay review, all welcome developments.
‡ "Concert" is intentionally chosen - we in the body are meant to operate like an orchestra, each playing its own part with individual excellence, but also in cooperation and not competition with the other parts. The violins must not only play on key, but must not drown out the oboes; and the second viola can't suddenly decide to break out with "Devil Went Down to Georgia" halfway through the Beethoven. Like them, we have a written score (the Bible) and a conductor (the clergy), and neither can be dispensed with.
Thursday, March 09, 2006
Waiting till next year
Some teams raise the bar; others raise the white flag.
Over the course of the past 24 hours the New York Islanders (whose mascot you see above) have traded four veteran players for two prospects and draft picks.
Granted, one of these vets, Oleg Kvasha, has long been a shaggy albatross round our necks. After signs last season that he may actually know what to do on a hockey rink, he's regressed, clogging the works and generally sucking the life from the team every shift he skates. I saw the Isles play New Jersey last month and he was so dreadful that I tried to start a chant mocking him. They benched him the last two periods and the Isles forced OT. Turning him into any sort of asset is a good move.
The rest? I like the deal with Los Angeles, even though it hurts losing the guys we gave up. Tambellini was the leading scorer for LA's top minor league affiliate and could do well given regular shifts the next four weeks. Not sure about the other kid yet. And draft picks, even modest third-rounders, are always an opportunity, and you never know who you may unearth.
In the meantime, we won't be seeing this any time soon.
Gillies looks like he could still lace 'em up, actually.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
The Semi-Carnival of Good Reads
The main show goes up this Sunday at the Jersey Goddess. Until then, stroll the fairgrounds and see a few of the booths that are already set up:
Fausta's got a new look, but the same ripping-good content. Today she reruns Michael Ledeen's testimony before the House Committee on International Relations, and it is a blast of blazing sunshine in the cavefish world of willfully weak-sighted diplomats. Don some Oakleys and read the whole thing. (Or, if you prefer, the New York Sun also ran it, as is, in their editorial pages.)
Related content: Mr. Bingley asks a very good question.
Don't miss the great nature-nurture post over at Sluggo's place.
Equal Time Dept. - without any burning opinion one way or the other, I'm mildly in favor of the new Meadowlands deal for the Giants (with the Jets tagging along). It strikes me as a better deal than about any other in the past ten years - the Giants are financing the entire construction and paying rent to the state. Many, including current Sports and Exposition Authority boss George Zoffinger, sharply disagree, and Enlighten NJ has their back.
Suzette has a post about a Welsh incident near and dear to the heart of the Jersey commuter - driving while distracted. (In this case, driving while Avon, as the lass in question was dolling up while in motion.) Do take her advice (Suzette's, not the driver's) and read the comments following the article.
Picture this - you're making a show about life 1000 years in the future. An episode requires a parodic warning film about the dangers of humans dating robots. Who do you pick as the alluring robot? In this case, the writers came up with the Marilyn Monroebot. It's more than how the last name works. (They could have said "Paltrowbot," and in fact they do get a dig in on poor Gwyneth.) It's about Monroe's presence and the easy (and 100% correct) realization, from the writers, that their audience would have no trouble believing that Monroe would be known in the year 3000. Sheila remarks on the enduring Marilyn phenomenon.
I've had good stuff too, I daresay, for which one can scroll a bit downward. But any more would threaten to steal the thunder of our fair hostess this week, and that's poor carny etiquette.
Fausta's got a new look, but the same ripping-good content. Today she reruns Michael Ledeen's testimony before the House Committee on International Relations, and it is a blast of blazing sunshine in the cavefish world of willfully weak-sighted diplomats. Don some Oakleys and read the whole thing. (Or, if you prefer, the New York Sun also ran it, as is, in their editorial pages.)
Related content: Mr. Bingley asks a very good question.
Don't miss the great nature-nurture post over at Sluggo's place.
Equal Time Dept. - without any burning opinion one way or the other, I'm mildly in favor of the new Meadowlands deal for the Giants (with the Jets tagging along). It strikes me as a better deal than about any other in the past ten years - the Giants are financing the entire construction and paying rent to the state. Many, including current Sports and Exposition Authority boss George Zoffinger, sharply disagree, and Enlighten NJ has their back.
Suzette has a post about a Welsh incident near and dear to the heart of the Jersey commuter - driving while distracted. (In this case, driving while Avon, as the lass in question was dolling up while in motion.) Do take her advice (Suzette's, not the driver's) and read the comments following the article.
Picture this - you're making a show about life 1000 years in the future. An episode requires a parodic warning film about the dangers of humans dating robots. Who do you pick as the alluring robot? In this case, the writers came up with the Marilyn Monroebot. It's more than how the last name works. (They could have said "Paltrowbot," and in fact they do get a dig in on poor Gwyneth.) It's about Monroe's presence and the easy (and 100% correct) realization, from the writers, that their audience would have no trouble believing that Monroe would be known in the year 3000. Sheila remarks on the enduring Marilyn phenomenon.
I've had good stuff too, I daresay, for which one can scroll a bit downward. But any more would threaten to steal the thunder of our fair hostess this week, and that's poor carny etiquette.
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
Puck everlasting
6:22 pm - Be sure to check the update below!
I want to show you something.
..G. .AB. Runs Hits .2b 3b .HR .RBI .BB ..K. .AVG .OBA .SLG
1783 7244 1071 2304 414 57 207 1085 450 _965 .318 .360 .477
1785 7003 1007 2153 442 20 222 1099 588 _444 .307 .358 .471
1626 5321 _938 1430 239 26 282 _934 740 1398 .269 .359 .482
1898 6621 1364 1917 403 63 411 1216 1357.1050 .290 *** .556
The top line belongs to Hall of Famer Kirby Puckett, recently deceased. The second line is the man who is most similar to him statistically (according to Baseball Reference.com), Don Mattingly. (The others, we'll get to later down.)
Mattingly has an AL MVP award; Puckett finished top five three times but never won. Each has one batting title. Puckett was the faster runner, and made more All-Star Teams; Mattingly has ten Gold Gloves to Puckett's six (and was so good afield that the Yankees once tried him at third base, even though he's lefthanded). They each suffered career-ending debilitative injuries (Puckett's glaucoma, Mattingly's back).
The difference is that the Yankees never played the World Series in Donnie Baseball's 14 years, while Puckett was the hero of two championship teams in Minnesota, not known for its title-winning ways. And though Puckett's "ambassador of the game" status took a major hit with allegations of sexual misconduct (he was acquitted of these charges), he was always the more likable player.
ESPN re-ran a great column about Puckett, from the mind of Ralph Wiley. You owe it to yourself to give it a read. One of many money quotes, if you please:
That was Wiley's way - slinging barbs down from the heavens. Like them or not, agree or disagree, they stung more than a little because the man had such good aim. His writing flowed like a graceful river, complete with rocks and rapids. And in a weird way, that made him a hero of mine, more than any of the three ballplayers whose stats got us started. No, not that I knew him, of course, but as he said, he helped my philosophy. He made me think and got me to be more clear about what's what in the world. Not many sportswriters do that - as Pantheon as he is, Bill Simmons doesn't make me think like Wiley did.
Wiley, by the way, is the fellow who brought up our third player. The red line of statistics belongs to Eric 'the Red' Davis, who like Mattingly was incandescent until injury stole his considerable gifts - in his case, a lacerated kidney in 1990 and colon cancer in 1996. Wiley says, in the column, that he'd take Davis in centerfield over Puckett. Interesting, but again, take it in the light of the quote above, and with other thoughtful opinion about Frank Deford's SI story - the one that first shone light on Puckett's darker side.
Now Puckett and Wiley are both on the other side, before their God. One can only imagine the conversation; my own imagination leads me to think that if either of them brings up the article at all, it will be as a joke - it won't be a difference to settle at all, since all accounts have already been squared. Usually one feels embarrased or awkward when at one's most self-conscious. What use is that once you've stopped trying to look better than you are, and are just yourself at last?
**post-script - SI is at it again, this time taking a whack at the Bonds piñata. Easier target, and much more likely to be true, especially since even Bonds' fans acknowledge that's he's generally unlikable. But... is that all? If Bonds is tried, does it change what we thought we knew? Let's face it, there's "exonerated" and then there's "getting over," and Bonds' alleged juicing definitely falls in the latter class, should he ever be acquitted.
update, 6:22 pm - thanks to the Coalition for their quick take. I asked in reply, does Bonds make the Hall of Fame without the tainted numbers?
Pretend that, instead of 'roids, he went for the nose candy like Darryl Strawberry. That leaves you with the fourth line in the stat box, italicized - Bonds' numbers from '86-'98, 13 seasons. I have to say yes. Even if you disqualify everything he did under afterward, those numbers are a mortal lock, first-ballot. (The on-base number is blank because I couldn't figure it with the limited time involved.) That makes the considerable evidence that he DID cheat even more puzzling. He was only 33 in 1998, and healthy (156 or more games played each of his last three years); while he may have begun to dip in the next five seasons or so, he was still good to reach about 550 dingers, maybe even 1750 rbi (that's top-ten all time actually, it would be 17th, ahead of Honus Wagner's 1732 and behind Frank Robinson's 1812), plus all the stolen bases. He was Barry Freaking Bonds! Damn it all.
I want to show you something.
..G. .AB. Runs Hits .2b 3b .HR .RBI .BB ..K. .AVG .OBA .SLG
1783 7244 1071 2304 414 57 207 1085 450 _965 .318 .360 .477
1785 7003 1007 2153 442 20 222 1099 588 _444 .307 .358 .471
1626 5321 _938 1430 239 26 282 _934 740 1398 .269 .359 .482
1898 6621 1364 1917 403 63 411 1216 1357.1050 .290 *** .556
The top line belongs to Hall of Famer Kirby Puckett, recently deceased. The second line is the man who is most similar to him statistically (according to Baseball Reference.com), Don Mattingly. (The others, we'll get to later down.)
Mattingly has an AL MVP award; Puckett finished top five three times but never won. Each has one batting title. Puckett was the faster runner, and made more All-Star Teams; Mattingly has ten Gold Gloves to Puckett's six (and was so good afield that the Yankees once tried him at third base, even though he's lefthanded). They each suffered career-ending debilitative injuries (Puckett's glaucoma, Mattingly's back).
The difference is that the Yankees never played the World Series in Donnie Baseball's 14 years, while Puckett was the hero of two championship teams in Minnesota, not known for its title-winning ways. And though Puckett's "ambassador of the game" status took a major hit with allegations of sexual misconduct (he was acquitted of these charges), he was always the more likable player.
ESPN re-ran a great column about Puckett, from the mind of Ralph Wiley. You owe it to yourself to give it a read. One of many money quotes, if you please:
"Think about that. You 'hate' a guy in sports because he's hurt you. He's hurt your team. That's why you hate him, basically because he's done a good job for his team, and made some other people deliriously happy. 'Hating' him has nothing to do with the actual guy. You don't know the actual guy.
Think about this: same thing goes when you 'love' a guy. You don't know him then either. He's helped your team win. He's helped your philosophy, your way of life, you. But you don't know him. So don't act like you do."
That was Wiley's way - slinging barbs down from the heavens. Like them or not, agree or disagree, they stung more than a little because the man had such good aim. His writing flowed like a graceful river, complete with rocks and rapids. And in a weird way, that made him a hero of mine, more than any of the three ballplayers whose stats got us started. No, not that I knew him, of course, but as he said, he helped my philosophy. He made me think and got me to be more clear about what's what in the world. Not many sportswriters do that - as Pantheon as he is, Bill Simmons doesn't make me think like Wiley did.
Wiley, by the way, is the fellow who brought up our third player. The red line of statistics belongs to Eric 'the Red' Davis, who like Mattingly was incandescent until injury stole his considerable gifts - in his case, a lacerated kidney in 1990 and colon cancer in 1996. Wiley says, in the column, that he'd take Davis in centerfield over Puckett. Interesting, but again, take it in the light of the quote above, and with other thoughtful opinion about Frank Deford's SI story - the one that first shone light on Puckett's darker side.
Now Puckett and Wiley are both on the other side, before their God. One can only imagine the conversation; my own imagination leads me to think that if either of them brings up the article at all, it will be as a joke - it won't be a difference to settle at all, since all accounts have already been squared. Usually one feels embarrased or awkward when at one's most self-conscious. What use is that once you've stopped trying to look better than you are, and are just yourself at last?
**post-script - SI is at it again, this time taking a whack at the Bonds piñata. Easier target, and much more likely to be true, especially since even Bonds' fans acknowledge that's he's generally unlikable. But... is that all? If Bonds is tried, does it change what we thought we knew? Let's face it, there's "exonerated" and then there's "getting over," and Bonds' alleged juicing definitely falls in the latter class, should he ever be acquitted.
update, 6:22 pm - thanks to the Coalition for their quick take. I asked in reply, does Bonds make the Hall of Fame without the tainted numbers?
Pretend that, instead of 'roids, he went for the nose candy like Darryl Strawberry. That leaves you with the fourth line in the stat box, italicized - Bonds' numbers from '86-'98, 13 seasons. I have to say yes. Even if you disqualify everything he did under afterward, those numbers are a mortal lock, first-ballot. (The on-base number is blank because I couldn't figure it with the limited time involved.) That makes the considerable evidence that he DID cheat even more puzzling. He was only 33 in 1998, and healthy (156 or more games played each of his last three years); while he may have begun to dip in the next five seasons or so, he was still good to reach about 550 dingers, maybe even 1750 rbi (
Monday, March 06, 2006
Step back, Wunder-san, step back!
And indeed, he is. Thanks for all the kind words and great posts!
WunderKraut's hiatus demonstrates two important things for us blog-stained wretches. First, it's not just about traffic or links, although those things are fun and rewarding. This is about who you meet and what you learn. From his output hither and yon, it's safe to say that the Wunder has been making good friends. I'm pleased to have met you myself, WK; don't be a stranger.
Second, the writer is the master, and not the blog. If it's time to take a break (or a permanent vacation), then do it and don't look back, except to smile for the times gone by.
I'll go now, before this breaks into song.
WunderKraut's hiatus demonstrates two important things for us blog-stained wretches. First, it's not just about traffic or links, although those things are fun and rewarding. This is about who you meet and what you learn. From his output hither and yon, it's safe to say that the Wunder has been making good friends. I'm pleased to have met you myself, WK; don't be a stranger.
Second, the writer is the master, and not the blog. If it's time to take a break (or a permanent vacation), then do it and don't look back, except to smile for the times gone by.
I'll go now, before this breaks into song.
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Volcano update
The Prussian Tiger comes through in the comments below, finding this information online from the Indonesia Digest. The eruption not only affected climate around the world but caused disastrous famine; over 90,000 died, and nearly 90% of those were in the aftermath. That link will take you through to one of the few eyewitness accounts of this eruption.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Not Atlantis, but they're working on it
When you think of lost civilizations you don't readily think of Rhode Island. That's why this article, filed from Narragansett, caught my attention.
Then I read a little further. The actual digging is going on in Indonesia, which makes much more sense, as the Atlantic is not known for its volcanos.* The diggers, however, are led by a gentleman in the employ of URI, with the delightful name of Haraldur Sigurdsson.
Then I read a little further. The actual digging is going on in Indonesia, which makes much more sense, as the Atlantic is not known for its volcanos.* The diggers, however, are led by a gentleman in the employ of URI, with the delightful name of Haraldur Sigurdsson.
Guided by ground-penetrating radar, researchers from the University of North Carolina at Wilmington and the Indonesian Directorate of Volcanology recently dug in a gully where locals had found ceramics and bones. They unearthed the remains of a thatch house, pottery, bronze and the carbonized bones of two people, all in a layer of sediment dating to the eruption.
That's just wicked cool.
The eruption shot 400 million tons (363 million metric tons) of sulfuric gases into the atmosphere, causing global cooling and creating what historians call "The Year Without a Summer." Farms in Maine suffered crop-killing frosts in June, July and August. In France and Germany, grape and corn crops died, or the harvests were delayed.
Mind you, this took place at Mount Tambora in Indonesia,** about 9900 miles away from Bangor, Maine - over the North Pole. (Paris is a relatively-short 7800 miles or so north-westward.)***
Dr. Sigurdsson has been at this for a while (note the date of this); no word whether he will continue his researches in the ruined plains of Osgiliath now that Barad-Dur has been overthrown.
* The good doctor is a native of Iceland, which in fact IS volcanic. The mental image of a frigid volcanic island reminds me that, as fun as fiction is, the real Earth is often strange enough.
** This website provided the Tambora info. It, too, is quite the bomb diggity.
*** Distances were calculated with this dandy web tool. Thanks, folks!
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
This looks like a job for...
Mardi Gras kicked off real spicy-like, with a well-known creature of the night making a rare sunlight appearance.
Rumor has it that he wasn’t their first choice.
In the end, the pro-DC crowd won out. But knowing the Bat's famous intolerance for corruption and crime, I doubt that Mayor Ovaltine is resting easy right now.
This one's for the good citizens of the Big Easy. Laissez les bon temps roulez, mes amis! You deserve it.
(My thanks to Toonapalooza for the pic, and especially to the artist.)
Monday, February 27, 2006
They say that it goes in threes
McCloud has joined his fellow deputy in the Precinct House in the Sky.
And for those of us in the sci-fi consumption market, sad news from outer space, via Sluggo: Andreas Katsulas has passed. Out there he was G'Kar or Tomalak, depending on your favorite flavor of space opera; on Earth he played the one-armed man vs. Harrison Ford and Tommy Lee Jones in the Fugitive.
That other thing with Scott Bakula? It never happened.
**Full Circle Dept: the Star Trek website also notes the passing of Paul Carr, who played the short-lived Lt. Kelso on the original Star Trek. Like Katsulas, he died of lung cancer. And his long list of TV credits includes acting in Gunsmoke, opposite Dennis Weaver.
****Holy (gun) Smokes Dept: Carr's last credit. The good ones keep on working, don't they?
And for those of us in the sci-fi consumption market, sad news from outer space, via Sluggo: Andreas Katsulas has passed. Out there he was G'Kar or Tomalak, depending on your favorite flavor of space opera; on Earth he played the one-armed man vs. Harrison Ford and Tommy Lee Jones in the Fugitive.
That other thing with Scott Bakula? It never happened.
**Full Circle Dept: the Star Trek website also notes the passing of Paul Carr, who played the short-lived Lt. Kelso on the original Star Trek. Like Katsulas, he died of lung cancer. And his long list of TV credits includes acting in Gunsmoke, opposite Dennis Weaver.
****Holy (gun) Smokes Dept: Carr's last credit. The good ones keep on working, don't they?
Sunday, February 26, 2006
Bad day for supporting actors
No more chit-chat with Don Knotts...
...and on the same day, the Old Man goes to his Major Award.
This is a sad day.
...and on the same day, the Old Man goes to his Major Award.
This is a sad day.
Thursday, February 23, 2006
It's getting misty in the Hive
Again, it is demonstrated that I have great readers and commenters, whom I am pleased to consider friends. It's not just approaching 6,000 visits since August '05. It's not even the gracious replies to my soul-searching posts. In fact, I almost feel like I should apologize for their increasing occurence, except that it would undercut the point, which is simple: I'm posting them. I wouldn't do it in a professional context. But I do it here precisely because I feel that I am among friends, even in a public forum. The danger is a string of ungracious email and commenting in reply from strangers, which I am willing to risk because of the kindness shown by all of you.
Could be that I have the answer I was looking for a few spots down. Blogging is very like a conversation at a bar or at a large party. People jump from group to group freely. Sometimes they don't like what they've heard and they barge in and make themselves a nuisance; sometimes they try the whole lampshade dancing routine and get themselves tossed out. There are diversions, tangents, jokes, and non-sequitors. In short, the conversation moves forward.
The best thing is that station, class, creed, and whatnot aren't restrictive. You and I are each free as the sunlight on the water. Bring your perspective, your humor, your huddled pensives yearning to think free - banter, badger, quip, and parry; raise questions, raise Cain, raise a glass and make a toast.
\~~~/ .. May the roof above never fall in
.\_/. .. And the friends below never fall out
*clink*
Could be that I have the answer I was looking for a few spots down. Blogging is very like a conversation at a bar or at a large party. People jump from group to group freely. Sometimes they don't like what they've heard and they barge in and make themselves a nuisance; sometimes they try the whole lampshade dancing routine and get themselves tossed out. There are diversions, tangents, jokes, and non-sequitors. In short, the conversation moves forward.
The best thing is that station, class, creed, and whatnot aren't restrictive. You and I are each free as the sunlight on the water. Bring your perspective, your humor, your huddled pensives yearning to think free - banter, badger, quip, and parry; raise questions, raise Cain, raise a glass and make a toast.
\~~~/ .. May the roof above never fall in
.\_/. .. And the friends below never fall out
*clink*
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Emily was right...
I am such a fascist. Either that, or someone at IP address 4.243.104.43 has quite the sense of humor. It doesn't matter, since said individual is banned. He pasted the Hive with a gargantuan comment about an hour ago, with the salutation: "Jesus Christ is a false god. At best all Christians can hope for is partial credit."
Hooray! Fun With Idiots!
"14 species of large animals capable of domesitcation in the history of mankind. 13 from Europe, Asia and northern Africa. None from the sub-Saharan African continent.
Favor. And disfavor. They point out Africans’ failed attempts to domesticate the elephant and zebra, the latter being an animal they illustrate that had utmost importance for it's applicability in transformation from a hunting/gathering to agrarian-based civilization. The roots of racism are not of this earth."
Oh, the eloquence. Oh, the logic.
"Organizational Heirarchy/Levels of positioning:
1. MUCK - perhaps have experienced multiple universal contractions (have seen multiple big bangs), creator of the artificial intelligence humans ignorantly refer to as 'god'
2. Perhaps some mid-level alien management
3. Evil/disfavored aliens - runs day-to-day operations here and perhaps elsewhere."
So many questions for our troll... how did you get lucky enough to blow the lid off the whole "AI Lord" business? How are you getting away with posting all of this behind the backs of evil aliens when it took me five minutes to look you up? (Maybe I'm one of them! You may be next!)
"Movies foreshadowing catastrophy"
Was there a movie about a really bad speller that I missed? (Must be direct-to-video.)
"1985 James Bond View to a Kill 1989 San Francisco Loma Prieta earthquake."
That's the ENTIRE LIST. And it's really such a stretch to boldly predict that San Francisco will suffer earthquakes. This guy must be some sort of L-Ron level genius.
Oh, and it goes on, paragraph after dreary paragraph. He even threatens to make sense talking about Wal-Mart and cheap overseas labor, but never quite gets there. And then he decides to revisit the prophetic teachings of the Great Glowing Box in the Den:
"Simpson's foreshadowing::
Helloween IV special, Flanders is Satan. "It's always the one you least suspect."
"You'll see lots of nuns where you're going:::hell." St. Wigham, Helloween VI:::missionary work, destroying cultures.
Over and over, the Simpsons was a source of education and enlightenment, a target of ridicule by the system which wishes to conceal its secrets."
All that systemic ridicule... It's a pity that the Simpsons were limited to a paltry 16-year run. Think of the secrets that died aborning!
"The similarity between the names "Santa" and "Satan" is no coincidence."
Well, then the Islanders are well and truly screwed. He even looks sinister.
As for "santa," I thought it meant saint in Italian. In fact, my father's grandmother was named Santa (and his grandfather was named Santo). But you know those Italians... "Amercia is a country of castoffs, rejects. Italy sent its criminals, malcontents. ... Mafia - the real-world 20th century interface that constantly turns over generationally so as to reinforce the widely-held notion of mortality."
We all know that mortality is for chumps and thetans. If you were truly enlightened you'd be as free as the air between this guy's ears. But you're stuck down here on Planet Earth with the rest of us, and it doesn't get any better, no matter who you are:
"Jews maim the body formed in the image of 'god', and inflicted circumcision upon all other white people."
If it's a false god, who cares what happened to the body? But no, keep going...
"I think about how Jews were used to create homosexuality among Slavics, supposedly retribution for the Holocaust."
I don't recall hearing this in Adam Sandler's Hanukkah Song. Would have brought the house down.
"For their suffering the Jew leaders were granted the right to prey on the up-and-coming Europeans to try to fix their problems with the ruling elite by imposing a false god upon white people, a recurring aspect of the elite's methodology."
Granted by whom? The evil aliens? The corporations? Hold on, let me scroll up a bit, I think he actually covered this...
"7. Jews, corporation, women, politician - Evidence exisits to suggest mafia management over all these groups."
Bingo! Damned Dago Nation!
"1. Labor unrest caused the world at war.
2. Black militancy ignited the crack epidemic and gang-related deaths.
3. Women's rights/sexual freedom produced Roe v Wade and women's exclusion from contention for Planet Immortality."
You know, I went to a Planet Immortality last time I was in Manhattan - good food, a bit pricey, and too loud to have a real conversation.
"But on the bright side peasants don't go. Money is one way of indicating favor, and if you're not wealthy you don't have favor, so don't sweat it::you weren't going anyways."
You mean, we have to stay away from you for all eternity? Say it ain't so!
"An evil republican will come forth to wreck havock upon the disfavored. The hunting incident was designed to ruin one possible candidate among his contingency, but others wait in the wings."
At least he's topical, right? Up-to-date nuts are the best kind. Any current event or social development plugs seamlessly into their Rube Goldberg worldview.
"All the groups mentioned throughout are necessary to justify the will of the managing species. They conceive a strategy, devise a plan yet need a way to implement it, and without these groups the managing species would be exposed in the course of execution. So, based upon their rank they are assigned goals to accomplish and are rewarded with favor..."
And at this point - after three full pages of single-spaced, 9-point type - our intrepid whistle blower cuts off. Out of space.
Or WAS HE?
Friends, watch your backs. Even reading this could put you at risk from Xenu's Traveling Bilgewater Killers. Just 'cause they're intensely stupid doesn't mean they have bad aim.
UPDATE - 2:00 pm - Bingley to the rescue! After failing here, Big Bad Xenu Daddy shot a copy over to the Coalition - with bonus material!
"I question if we would experience global warming if they didn't terraform with an ultimate goal of destroying disfavored human life on planet earth::::they terraform the weather as they did in New Orleans with Hurricane Katrina (and lots of other examples) and justify it with behavior like instructing their petroleum friends to repress alternative technologies and encourage waste."
I was waiting for Chimpy W. McHitlerburton to make his entrance on the stage. They saved him for the finale, sort of like the Level Boss in a video game.
"This is all happening shortly after the Exodus of 2000 (clues::Hong Kong, Panama Canal) for a reason::: they are INFLICTING it upon us, they are hastening closure. Everybody they care about has come up, replaced by clones, and they want to proceed in haste."
Clones. Our friend forgot to add Episode II to the list of cinematic prohpecies. Well, I'll cut him slack if you do. After all, if caring is the measuring stick, this fellow is definitely NOT a clone.
"Armeggedon isn’t about the end of the world. Armeggedon is about the death of the disfavored left behind. And they weren’t lying::this time it is going to happen with fire. But it's not going to happen because of global warming."
WHAT?!?!? Make up what little mind you have!
"To silence the inevitable internal conflict it's going to happen in the blink of an eye:::::As Edgar Cayce prophicised Earth's axis will shift breaking continental plates free and initiating mass subduction."
Edgar Blargin' Cayce? I waded through all of that plus a sequel for EDGAR CAYCE? Bastard. Mr. B, go ahead and delete with extreme prejudice.
Hooray! Fun With Idiots!
"14 species of large animals capable of domesitcation in the history of mankind. 13 from Europe, Asia and northern Africa. None from the sub-Saharan African continent.
Favor. And disfavor. They point out Africans’ failed attempts to domesticate the elephant and zebra, the latter being an animal they illustrate that had utmost importance for it's applicability in transformation from a hunting/gathering to agrarian-based civilization. The roots of racism are not of this earth."
Oh, the eloquence. Oh, the logic.
"Organizational Heirarchy/Levels of positioning:
1. MUCK - perhaps have experienced multiple universal contractions (have seen multiple big bangs), creator of the artificial intelligence humans ignorantly refer to as 'god'
2. Perhaps some mid-level alien management
3. Evil/disfavored aliens - runs day-to-day operations here and perhaps elsewhere."
So many questions for our troll... how did you get lucky enough to blow the lid off the whole "AI Lord" business? How are you getting away with posting all of this behind the backs of evil aliens when it took me five minutes to look you up? (Maybe I'm one of them! You may be next!)
"Movies foreshadowing catastrophy"
Was there a movie about a really bad speller that I missed? (Must be direct-to-video.)
"1985 James Bond View to a Kill 1989 San Francisco Loma Prieta earthquake."
That's the ENTIRE LIST. And it's really such a stretch to boldly predict that San Francisco will suffer earthquakes. This guy must be some sort of L-Ron level genius.
Oh, and it goes on, paragraph after dreary paragraph. He even threatens to make sense talking about Wal-Mart and cheap overseas labor, but never quite gets there. And then he decides to revisit the prophetic teachings of the Great Glowing Box in the Den:
"Simpson's foreshadowing::
Helloween IV special, Flanders is Satan. "It's always the one you least suspect."
"You'll see lots of nuns where you're going:::hell." St. Wigham, Helloween VI:::missionary work, destroying cultures.
Over and over, the Simpsons was a source of education and enlightenment, a target of ridicule by the system which wishes to conceal its secrets."
All that systemic ridicule... It's a pity that the Simpsons were limited to a paltry 16-year run. Think of the secrets that died aborning!
"The similarity between the names "Santa" and "Satan" is no coincidence."
Well, then the Islanders are well and truly screwed. He even looks sinister.
As for "santa," I thought it meant saint in Italian. In fact, my father's grandmother was named Santa (and his grandfather was named Santo). But you know those Italians... "Amercia is a country of castoffs, rejects. Italy sent its criminals, malcontents. ... Mafia - the real-world 20th century interface that constantly turns over generationally so as to reinforce the widely-held notion of mortality."
We all know that mortality is for chumps and thetans. If you were truly enlightened you'd be as free as the air between this guy's ears. But you're stuck down here on Planet Earth with the rest of us, and it doesn't get any better, no matter who you are:
"Jews maim the body formed in the image of 'god', and inflicted circumcision upon all other white people."
If it's a false god, who cares what happened to the body? But no, keep going...
"I think about how Jews were used to create homosexuality among Slavics, supposedly retribution for the Holocaust."
I don't recall hearing this in Adam Sandler's Hanukkah Song. Would have brought the house down.
"For their suffering the Jew leaders were granted the right to prey on the up-and-coming Europeans to try to fix their problems with the ruling elite by imposing a false god upon white people, a recurring aspect of the elite's methodology."
Granted by whom? The evil aliens? The corporations? Hold on, let me scroll up a bit, I think he actually covered this...
"7. Jews, corporation, women, politician - Evidence exisits to suggest mafia management over all these groups."
Bingo! Damned Dago Nation!
"1. Labor unrest caused the world at war.
2. Black militancy ignited the crack epidemic and gang-related deaths.
3. Women's rights/sexual freedom produced Roe v Wade and women's exclusion from contention for Planet Immortality."
You know, I went to a Planet Immortality last time I was in Manhattan - good food, a bit pricey, and too loud to have a real conversation.
"But on the bright side peasants don't go. Money is one way of indicating favor, and if you're not wealthy you don't have favor, so don't sweat it::you weren't going anyways."
You mean, we have to stay away from you for all eternity? Say it ain't so!
"An evil republican will come forth to wreck havock upon the disfavored. The hunting incident was designed to ruin one possible candidate among his contingency, but others wait in the wings."
At least he's topical, right? Up-to-date nuts are the best kind. Any current event or social development plugs seamlessly into their Rube Goldberg worldview.
"All the groups mentioned throughout are necessary to justify the will of the managing species. They conceive a strategy, devise a plan yet need a way to implement it, and without these groups the managing species would be exposed in the course of execution. So, based upon their rank they are assigned goals to accomplish and are rewarded with favor..."
And at this point - after three full pages of single-spaced, 9-point type - our intrepid whistle blower cuts off. Out of space.
Or WAS HE?
Friends, watch your backs. Even reading this could put you at risk from Xenu's Traveling Bilgewater Killers. Just 'cause they're intensely stupid doesn't mean they have bad aim.
UPDATE - 2:00 pm - Bingley to the rescue! After failing here, Big Bad Xenu Daddy shot a copy over to the Coalition - with bonus material!
"I question if we would experience global warming if they didn't terraform with an ultimate goal of destroying disfavored human life on planet earth::::they terraform the weather as they did in New Orleans with Hurricane Katrina (and lots of other examples) and justify it with behavior like instructing their petroleum friends to repress alternative technologies and encourage waste."
I was waiting for Chimpy W. McHitlerburton to make his entrance on the stage. They saved him for the finale, sort of like the Level Boss in a video game.
"This is all happening shortly after the Exodus of 2000 (clues::Hong Kong, Panama Canal) for a reason::: they are INFLICTING it upon us, they are hastening closure. Everybody they care about has come up, replaced by clones, and they want to proceed in haste."
Clones. Our friend forgot to add Episode II to the list of cinematic prohpecies. Well, I'll cut him slack if you do. After all, if caring is the measuring stick, this fellow is definitely NOT a clone.
"Armeggedon isn’t about the end of the world. Armeggedon is about the death of the disfavored left behind. And they weren’t lying::this time it is going to happen with fire. But it's not going to happen because of global warming."
WHAT?!?!? Make up what little mind you have!
"To silence the inevitable internal conflict it's going to happen in the blink of an eye:::::As Edgar Cayce prophicised Earth's axis will shift breaking continental plates free and initiating mass subduction."
Edgar Blargin' Cayce? I waded through all of that plus a sequel for EDGAR CAYCE? Bastard. Mr. B, go ahead and delete with extreme prejudice.
Bill Simmons' next column
I mean, not to step on his toes or anything, but "Knicks near deal for Steve Francis" kind of jumps out at you.
Isiah Thomas just may be the worst GM I've ever seen, in any sport - and I watched Don Maloney trade Pierre Turgeon for Kirk Muller, followed by nine years of Mike Milbury. Considering his health problems, Larry Brown is lucky that this season hasn't killed him yet.
Putting Francis on the same court as Stephon Marbury is sort of like tasting some Chinese food, saying, "Wow, that's salty," and then adding soy sauce and MSG. Why not bring in Jason Williams and play them all at once - I mean, if one shoot-first point guard is so good that you want two, then three must be fantastic, right? They'll have to treat the court like a prison yard and check people for shivs before letting them play.
It has the makings of the best fight at Madison Square Garden since Ali-Frazier I - unless Brown decks Isiah first.
Isiah Thomas just may be the worst GM I've ever seen, in any sport - and I watched Don Maloney trade Pierre Turgeon for Kirk Muller, followed by nine years of Mike Milbury. Considering his health problems, Larry Brown is lucky that this season hasn't killed him yet.
Putting Francis on the same court as Stephon Marbury is sort of like tasting some Chinese food, saying, "Wow, that's salty," and then adding soy sauce and MSG. Why not bring in Jason Williams and play them all at once - I mean, if one shoot-first point guard is so good that you want two, then three must be fantastic, right? They'll have to treat the court like a prison yard and check people for shivs before letting them play.
It has the makings of the best fight at Madison Square Garden since Ali-Frazier I - unless Brown decks Isiah first.
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
I hope that this goes somewhere
Hi folks. Thanks for bearing with the silence. I've been doing a lot of full-tilt mulling, of a sort that doesn't easily translate into text, so this may be a little fitful.
The talk-folk at NJ 101.5 FM decided, in so many words, to auction off their 7-11 pm show, American Idol-style. Call in, do a little spiel, get narrowed down to 16. Then you do an hour in the booth with the regular hosts and get cut down to eight; then another hour, another cut. The final four get one full 7-11 show to themselves, and after two more rounds of that, the last host talking is the new permanent addition to the talk-radio firmament.
I'd considered doing this. It's not that I don't love my job, because I do. I've been there longer than five years now. I have a pension and everything. Truth be told, I didn't think I had more than a remote chance of actually landing the gig - but - and this is where the logic falters - I wanted to try. I mean, "Nightfly" was chosen in homage to the Donald Fagen song of the same name, about... a late-night radio host. I looked into college radio while I was there, and community radio after that, and hemmed and hawed and generally spazzed about the idea. It's a lot of work - for every hour at the board, a host spends two in prep, recording promos and bumps, researching topics...
At this point in my life, maybe I was just tired of saying to myself, "Binkley, you bored, miserable yuppie, you never went for the gusto." I'm not a "jump off the horse for the brass ring" personality - I'm almost anally competitive, but not really a risk-taker. ("I'll have the plain vanilla ice cream, please - but it's got to be the BEST DAMN CONE EVER.") But I wanted to be sure; I talked it over with my friends, my girlfriend, my boss... The heavy favorite in these conversations was, "Go for it." (Or as one of my friends said, "Promise them listeners - if you get it I'll actually tune in.")
On the appointed day, I called, got to the screener, got on hold. The rest is non-history. I hung up before I hit the air. Life goes on without me.
That's what's left me short of thoughts to share these past few days. It wasn't lack of topics. I have about five or six posts on the burner that will be popping up in the evenings these next few days. I've just been sidetracked. I go back and forth about it, between "prudent choice" and "buck-BRAWWWWK." I like to think I'd have done well - but did I bail in order not to disturb that little notion? Sometimes I have trouble with four topics a week to blog; this gig would require four a day, four times a week, every week from now until closing time. Could I dodge the dreaded dead air? Would I have any creative freedom (to do stuff like this)?
So there it is. Thank you, loyal listeners, for sharing this episode of Nightfly's Midlife Crisis.
The talk-folk at NJ 101.5 FM decided, in so many words, to auction off their 7-11 pm show, American Idol-style. Call in, do a little spiel, get narrowed down to 16. Then you do an hour in the booth with the regular hosts and get cut down to eight; then another hour, another cut. The final four get one full 7-11 show to themselves, and after two more rounds of that, the last host talking is the new permanent addition to the talk-radio firmament.
I'd considered doing this. It's not that I don't love my job, because I do. I've been there longer than five years now. I have a pension and everything. Truth be told, I didn't think I had more than a remote chance of actually landing the gig - but - and this is where the logic falters - I wanted to try. I mean, "Nightfly" was chosen in homage to the Donald Fagen song of the same name, about... a late-night radio host. I looked into college radio while I was there, and community radio after that, and hemmed and hawed and generally spazzed about the idea. It's a lot of work - for every hour at the board, a host spends two in prep, recording promos and bumps, researching topics...
At this point in my life, maybe I was just tired of saying to myself, "Binkley, you bored, miserable yuppie, you never went for the gusto." I'm not a "jump off the horse for the brass ring" personality - I'm almost anally competitive, but not really a risk-taker. ("I'll have the plain vanilla ice cream, please - but it's got to be the BEST DAMN CONE EVER.") But I wanted to be sure; I talked it over with my friends, my girlfriend, my boss... The heavy favorite in these conversations was, "Go for it." (Or as one of my friends said, "Promise them listeners - if you get it I'll actually tune in.")
On the appointed day, I called, got to the screener, got on hold. The rest is non-history. I hung up before I hit the air. Life goes on without me.
That's what's left me short of thoughts to share these past few days. It wasn't lack of topics. I have about five or six posts on the burner that will be popping up in the evenings these next few days. I've just been sidetracked. I go back and forth about it, between "prudent choice" and "buck-BRAWWWWK." I like to think I'd have done well - but did I bail in order not to disturb that little notion? Sometimes I have trouble with four topics a week to blog; this gig would require four a day, four times a week, every week from now until closing time. Could I dodge the dreaded dead air? Would I have any creative freedom (to do stuff like this)?
So there it is. Thank you, loyal listeners, for sharing this episode of Nightfly's Midlife Crisis.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
You're the best....around!
Mr. Snitch's labor of love is completed! Behold...
They are many, varied, and will give you hours of enjoyment. Some are from friends you'll see in my Pantheon to the right, though I don't think any of my own posts are there. I didn't submit anything of my own, to be honest; going through my 250 (at the time) was a challenge I had no leisure for. That Mr. Snitch did it for a heaping hunk of the Wild Wild Web* is astonishing, and deserves king-sized kudos.
Lacking those, I've decided to contribute by sponsoring an ongoing effort to keep 2006's best posts...
This new button will sit with the 2005 button at the top of the table. If you see something worth remembering, click it through to the man, won't you? And consider buying the book! (It goes well with milk and cookies, apparently...)
*credit (as far as I know) goes to Sheila for this phrase. If there are earlier cites please let me know!
They are many, varied, and will give you hours of enjoyment. Some are from friends you'll see in my Pantheon to the right, though I don't think any of my own posts are there. I didn't submit anything of my own, to be honest; going through my 250 (at the time) was a challenge I had no leisure for. That Mr. Snitch did it for a heaping hunk of the Wild Wild Web* is astonishing, and deserves king-sized kudos.
Lacking those, I've decided to contribute by sponsoring an ongoing effort to keep 2006's best posts...
This new button will sit with the 2005 button at the top of the table. If you see something worth remembering, click it through to the man, won't you? And consider buying the book! (It goes well with milk and cookies, apparently...)
*credit (as far as I know) goes to Sheila for this phrase. If there are earlier cites please let me know!
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Sunday, February 12, 2006
Evening update
This sort of thing is hard on the little guys, though:
Well, OK, I'm not Good King Wenceslas or anything, but I feel a little better. Not everyone trusts me, though.
And really, would you trust some loud, barging critter sixteen times your size if he popped out of an enormous door and dropped twelve pounds of M&M's on the ground? And then snapped your picture?
Well, OK, I'm not Good King Wenceslas or anything, but I feel a little better. Not everyone trusts me, though.
And really, would you trust some loud, barging critter sixteen times your size if he popped out of an enormous door and dropped twelve pounds of M&M's on the ground? And then snapped your picture?
Sunday in the snow with George
The view around the neighborhood was quite lovely once the snow stopped... Until you had to actually dig out.
The Discount Chariot is under there somewhere. I figured that I'd start the excavations early and be ready for tomorrow morning's commute.
That's the business end of the sweeper, to give you an idea of how deep a drift we're talking about. The snow was about 16 inches thick in this part of New Jersey.
At last! Success! I learned from last year's big snowfall, when I parked on the other side of the street and got plowed in halfway through my shoveling. Again, a little shot with a common household item for perspective:
By the way, I'm sorry about these annoying white borders. I am still figuring out the cropping and resizing business.
I took a walk after and checked out some of the rest of the neighborhood, and found this at the local chapel. Somebody's peeping out from under all of that tree and snow.
He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake...
The Discount Chariot is under there somewhere. I figured that I'd start the excavations early and be ready for tomorrow morning's commute.
That's the business end of the sweeper, to give you an idea of how deep a drift we're talking about. The snow was about 16 inches thick in this part of New Jersey.
At last! Success! I learned from last year's big snowfall, when I parked on the other side of the street and got plowed in halfway through my shoveling. Again, a little shot with a common household item for perspective:
By the way, I'm sorry about these annoying white borders. I am still figuring out the cropping and resizing business.
I took a walk after and checked out some of the rest of the neighborhood, and found this at the local chapel. Somebody's peeping out from under all of that tree and snow.
He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake...I wish I'd had more time. Once you don't actually have to do anything or go anywhere, this is actually a lot of fun - walking around, no place to be, snapping some pics, enjoying the general peace and quiet, and saying hello to fellow shovelers.
Not everyone digs this sort of thing, of course. [Digs. Heheheheh.] Mr. B, if I could have, I would have sent this guy over.
I've had it to here with the shovels, thankyouverymuch.
Saturday, February 11, 2006
Hope you're home reading this
...it's dangerous outside. Just got back home about a half hour ago and it is treacherous driving up and down the Jersey Shore. It does, however, make for some pretty scenery:
Enjoy it with some hot cocoa and a loved one to hug. Bonus points for fireplaces and pets sleeping nearby!
Enjoy it with some hot cocoa and a loved one to hug. Bonus points for fireplaces and pets sleeping nearby!
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Eeeeenteresting...
Of course, it's late in the game to talk about the game, or the commercials, but was this a crummy Super Bowl or what? There were maybe five great plays total, and mostly lousy commercials. I got sick of that ESPN Mobile thing right quick. Monster's "Working with jackasses" was funny. "Magic Fridge" was cool, but it came so soon. Budweiser then pulled a Roethlisburger and tossed a huge INT with the "Grizzly Beer" ad, such a tasteless riff on Grizzly Man that I left the room.
The MI:3 ad was also funny, but unintentionally so, and in a way I didn't immediately notice. At first all I noticed was not one but two Tom Cruise Running Scenes (he's kicking this one up a notch!). And of course, there's Philip Seymour Hoffman absolutely blasting him off the screen in six seconds - the very beginning, where Tom is making the I'm So Intense It's Scary Face, Philip actually is intense. The contrast is so amazing that I laughed on the spot, without asking an important question - if this clip makes the headliner look bad, why is it the trailer they premiered on Super Bowl Sunday in front of 100 million people?
Then I saw it again last night and it hit me - I listened to Philip's little spiel to Cruise: "I'll find your wife, and I'm going to hurt her...and then I'm going to kill you in front of her."
Now, movies are in production for a long time before they hit the screen, so the plot is one thing, but the trailer? Dollars to donuts that Tom's feeling a mite spooked by all the negative attention bearing down on his crummy little cult and especially his kidnapping and brainwashing of Katie Holmes. That trailer is his answer - "They're after me and Katie! How dare they!" I half-expect Ethan Hunt to tell Hoffman not to be glib.
The MI:3 ad was also funny, but unintentionally so, and in a way I didn't immediately notice. At first all I noticed was not one but two Tom Cruise Running Scenes (he's kicking this one up a notch!). And of course, there's Philip Seymour Hoffman absolutely blasting him off the screen in six seconds - the very beginning, where Tom is making the I'm So Intense It's Scary Face, Philip actually is intense. The contrast is so amazing that I laughed on the spot, without asking an important question - if this clip makes the headliner look bad, why is it the trailer they premiered on Super Bowl Sunday in front of 100 million people?
Then I saw it again last night and it hit me - I listened to Philip's little spiel to Cruise: "I'll find your wife, and I'm going to hurt her...and then I'm going to kill you in front of her."
Now, movies are in production for a long time before they hit the screen, so the plot is one thing, but the trailer? Dollars to donuts that Tom's feeling a mite spooked by all the negative attention bearing down on his crummy little cult and especially his kidnapping and brainwashing of Katie Holmes. That trailer is his answer - "They're after me and Katie! How dare they!" I half-expect Ethan Hunt to tell Hoffman not to be glib.
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
Bad news on the doorstep
Suzette's sweet dog is in a bad way. I love dogs (and corgis are nifty examples of the genre) and this makes me sad.
The dog above is named Juno, and she works as a therapy dog in New York City. The dog to the right is named Ein, and he is the pet of the bounty hunters of Cowboy Bebop. They are here to show corgi solidarity with Bob in his illness.
Good luck!
The dog above is named Juno, and she works as a therapy dog in New York City. The dog to the right is named Ein, and he is the pet of the bounty hunters of Cowboy Bebop. They are here to show corgi solidarity with Bob in his illness.
Good luck!
Stand!
Stand! In the end, you'll still be you
One that's done all the things you've set out to do
Stand! There's a cross for you to bear
Things to go through if you're going anywhere
Stand! For the things you know are right
It's the truth that the truth makes them so uptight
Stand! All the things you want are real
You have you to complete and there is no deal...
-- Sly and the Family Stone
This goes quite well with the tin of butter cookies. You can get this and similar banners here from the Dissident Frogman.
One that's done all the things you've set out to do
Stand! There's a cross for you to bear
Things to go through if you're going anywhere
Stand! For the things you know are right
It's the truth that the truth makes them so uptight
Stand! All the things you want are real
You have you to complete and there is no deal...
-- Sly and the Family Stone
This goes quite well with the tin of butter cookies. You can get this and similar banners here from the Dissident Frogman.
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Oh, grow up already
Mike Holmgren - your Seattle Seahawks lost the Super Bowl! You're not going to Disney World! What are you going to do? Blame the refs!
Bad form, Mike. For fun, let's go over the calls -
1st quarter - offensive interference in end zone. Touchy. Let's give you the seven instead of the three you settled for.
2nd quarter - touchdown, Pittsburgh. The ball barely barely crossed the line. To Seattle, this must have seemed a replay of the infamous "touchdown" by Vinnie Testaverde that helped keep the Seahawks out of the 1998 playoffs.* But this was much closer, and given the evidence, the ref could not overturn the call. (My first impression at full-speed was that he didn't get in, which left the ball a midget's whisker from the touchdown. But it's a matter of a centimeter. You need to let this go.)
4th quarter - holding erases a first down at the 1-yard line. It wasn't as bad as the 3rd-quarter hold that similarly erased a big play, but it was definitely a hold. The guy was parallel to the ground and couldn't fall because the lineman had him tied up. That's not blocking.
4th quarter - the low block on the INT return - that was a bad call. Hasselbeck took down the ballcarrier legally. But that's still Pittsburgh's ball, right? And on the option pass from Randle El to Ward, nobody was near catching him. All that means is that Ward has to run an extra fifteen yards before scoring.
All that still leaves the Seahawks short at the end. But, no, it was the refs, right, Mike?
Apparently, a ref kidnapped Jerramy Stevens and wore his uniform, dropping all of those passes. Officials subbed for both your kickers, missing two field goal tries and punting into the end zone four times. A ref butchered the clock at the end of each half, costing your team 14 possible points. Somehow they commandeered your headset and called 55 pass plays, not including plays erased by penalty. (Hasselbeck scrambled three times and was sacked three others.) A ref limited the league's leading rusher and MVP to 20 carries behind your dominant offensive line. Then with 6:30 left in the game, trailing by two scores, a ref ordered you to punt from near midfield instead of trying for first down. (One of those other refs promptly knocked it into the end zone and gave Pittsburgh the ball at the 20.)
Complaining afterwards isn't a better plan that the one you had during the game. But maybe you agree with fans at the rally:
Are you sure? The scoreboard kinda says something different. "We won in our hearts." That and 3 bucks gets you a decaf latte.
*Wow, '98? That seemed more recent. I remember it mostly because the "tackle" was made by Rutgers alum Jay Bellamy, who is still in the league.
"We knew it was going to be tough going up against the Pittsburgh Steelers," Holmgren said. "I didn't know we were going to have to play the guys in the striped shirts as well."
Bad form, Mike. For fun, let's go over the calls -
1st quarter - offensive interference in end zone. Touchy. Let's give you the seven instead of the three you settled for.
2nd quarter - touchdown, Pittsburgh. The ball barely barely crossed the line. To Seattle, this must have seemed a replay of the infamous "touchdown" by Vinnie Testaverde that helped keep the Seahawks out of the 1998 playoffs.* But this was much closer, and given the evidence, the ref could not overturn the call. (My first impression at full-speed was that he didn't get in, which left the ball a midget's whisker from the touchdown. But it's a matter of a centimeter. You need to let this go.)
4th quarter - holding erases a first down at the 1-yard line. It wasn't as bad as the 3rd-quarter hold that similarly erased a big play, but it was definitely a hold. The guy was parallel to the ground and couldn't fall because the lineman had him tied up. That's not blocking.
4th quarter - the low block on the INT return - that was a bad call. Hasselbeck took down the ballcarrier legally. But that's still Pittsburgh's ball, right? And on the option pass from Randle El to Ward, nobody was near catching him. All that means is that Ward has to run an extra fifteen yards before scoring.
All that still leaves the Seahawks short at the end. But, no, it was the refs, right, Mike?
Apparently, a ref kidnapped Jerramy Stevens and wore his uniform, dropping all of those passes. Officials subbed for both your kickers, missing two field goal tries and punting into the end zone four times. A ref butchered the clock at the end of each half, costing your team 14 possible points. Somehow they commandeered your headset and called 55 pass plays, not including plays erased by penalty. (Hasselbeck scrambled three times and was sacked three others.) A ref limited the league's leading rusher and MVP to 20 carries behind your dominant offensive line. Then with 6:30 left in the game, trailing by two scores, a ref ordered you to punt from near midfield instead of trying for first down. (One of those other refs promptly knocked it into the end zone and gave Pittsburgh the ball at the 20.)
Complaining afterwards isn't a better plan that the one you had during the game. But maybe you agree with fans at the rally:
Teenagers Malissa Dunn, Nickey Horgan and Gena Copley took a parents-sanctioned day off from school to paint their faces blue and green and score front-row seats. "We won in our hearts," said Horgan, 15. "We're still No. 1." [emphasis mine]
Are you sure? The scoreboard kinda says something different. "We won in our hearts." That and 3 bucks gets you a decaf latte.
*Wow, '98? That seemed more recent. I remember it mostly because the "tackle" was made by Rutgers alum Jay Bellamy, who is still in the league.
Someone got the memo
update - 8 Feb, 2006, 7:30 pm - you know, the more I think about it, the more I read it, and the more I read it, the more tasteless the intro sounds. It wasn't what I meant at all, so I've changed it to reflect what I do, in fact, mean. Sorry.
It turns out that somebody's lurking in the Hive, but not necessarily the best sort of company. Remember Friday's suggestion that one ought to match cartoons with cartoons? Well, lookie here:
One needs to pass the time before nuking Israel, anyway. But, alas, there's always a problem.
Use your imagination, Ali.
Imagination?!? BLASPHEMER!
And wouldn't that be some lead? "Teheran (AP) - The offices of the newspaper Hamshahri were firebombed yesterday in response to calls from its graphics editor to make graven images of the hated Jews."
Well, OK, two problems - "so-called Holocaust revisionist historians." Let's see, they dispute the Holocaust and seek to rewrite the historical record. What else would you so call that, besides revisionist - at least, what else would you call it that I can repeat in public?
Come to think of it, that makes three problems. Iran's reading my blog? Hell damn crap.
It turns out that somebody's lurking in the Hive, but not necessarily the best sort of company. Remember Friday's suggestion that one ought to match cartoons with cartoons? Well, lookie here:
Iran's largest selling newspaper announced today it was holding a contest on cartoons of the Holocaust in response to the publishing in European papers of caricatures of the Prophet Mohammed. "It will be an international cartoon contest about the Holocaust," said Farid Mortazavi, the graphics editor for Hamshahri newspaper - which is published by Teheran's conservative municipality.
One needs to pass the time before nuking Israel, anyway. But, alas, there's always a problem.
Iran's fiercely anti-Israeli regime is supportive of so-called Holocaust revisionist historians, who maintain the systematic slaughter by the Nazis of mainland Europe's Jews as well as other groups during World War II has been either invented or exaggerated.Um, Farid? How am I supposed to make fun of something that didn't happen?
Use your imagination, Ali.
Imagination?!? BLASPHEMER!
And wouldn't that be some lead? "Teheran (AP) - The offices of the newspaper Hamshahri were firebombed yesterday in response to calls from its graphics editor to make graven images of the hated Jews."
Well, OK, two problems - "so-called Holocaust revisionist historians." Let's see, they dispute the Holocaust and seek to rewrite the historical record. What else would you so call that, besides revisionist - at least, what else would you call it that I can repeat in public?
Mr Blair also said Mr Ahmadinejad "should come and see the evidence of the Holocaust himself in the countries of Europe", to which Iran responded by saying it was willing to send a team of "independent investigators"."Independent investigators." OK, you got me, that's another term. However, it's not the most accurate term, considering that the Mr. Ahmadinejad's definition of 'independent' is 'please me or I shoot you and your family.'
Come to think of it, that makes three problems. Iran's reading my blog? Hell damn crap.
Friday, February 03, 2006
We're all Danish now
And in that spirit, I feel like I ought to do my part:
(picture ©2001 Mike Overbeck. Visit him!)
I tip my wings to the Coalition of the Swilling (happy first blogiversary!) for the post and this BBC article that got the ball rolling.
PS - THIS is how you protest, kids. Any fool can blow stuff up, but can you turn the tables?
My actual entry to the contest is somewhat different. In the meantime, I observe that we only lop off arms artistically - others do it for real. (Be sure to pause your mouse over the pics, as always.)
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
It's all about the Hamiltons
10 BUCKS
20 GOTO 10
This is very Jerseyan. The Senate would like electronics manufacturers to recycle more - not a bad thing, and many already do this. Dell offers to take your old system away for free when you get a new one, and, according to the article, "Heather Bowman, who heads the internal recycling division at Hewlett Packard, said her company has long maintained buildings in California and Tennessee dedicated to reclaiming discarded electronics." But the state wants to add more: a ten dollar surcharge, to be passed on to the consumer, when purchasing the electronics. It would cover microwaves, TVs, computers, and cell phones, to name a few.
The headline of the article, "State studies $10 recycling surcharge," is a little misleading. The bill (S-557) has already been drafted and has escaped committee. This sounds like it's already been studied and found credible, and thus has been forwarded to the whole Senate for a vote.
Not that Mr. Lance is the taxpayers' knight in shining armor. " 'If there is a need for a recycling charge it should occur at the time of the recycling,' Lance said." Gee, thanks. It almost sounds like someone in the state Senate took a dare from a colleague -
Hey, Len, I bet you I can pass a surcharge on recycling TVs, and also pass a law requiring people to recycle them!
No way, Bob. People would notice.
Not only can I do it - I bet you double that I can put both provisions in the SAME BILL.
[laughing] You're crazy, man. Right out there. I love it.
The article doesn't tell you the man who took the dare, but I looked it up: S-557 is sponsored by Robert G. Smith, D-Middlesex. The article raises the possibility, perhaps overlooked by Mr. Smith, that businesses will move to neighboring states to dodge the surcharge. One possibility not mentioned is that, given the extra $10, people may put off new purchases of these items, leading to the state coming out behind - losing more in sales taxes not collected than they gain with the surcharge. Another expense is a provision to "give manufacturers 12 months from the effective date to curb the use of lead, mercury, cadmium, chromium and other toxics in favor of less-harmful alternatives."
Again, not a terrible idea, though businesses will naturally pass along some of the R&D costs of these alternatives. I just wish that the state would consider its citizens a little more - if the products themselves are already going to be more expensive, then the tax bite on them ought to be enough of a boost to the general treasury. Why a surcharge as well?
20 GOTO 10
This is very Jerseyan. The Senate would like electronics manufacturers to recycle more - not a bad thing, and many already do this. Dell offers to take your old system away for free when you get a new one, and, according to the article, "Heather Bowman, who heads the internal recycling division at Hewlett Packard, said her company has long maintained buildings in California and Tennessee dedicated to reclaiming discarded electronics." But the state wants to add more: a ten dollar surcharge, to be passed on to the consumer, when purchasing the electronics. It would cover microwaves, TVs, computers, and cell phones, to name a few.
The headline of the article, "State studies $10 recycling surcharge," is a little misleading. The bill (S-557) has already been drafted and has escaped committee. This sounds like it's already been studied and found credible, and thus has been forwarded to the whole Senate for a vote.
"Senate Minority Leader Leonard Lance, R-Hunterdon/Warren, questioned the fairness of the measure. He said the bill is the latest in a number of fees and nuisance taxes New Jersey residents are facing. Lance said he hopes it is not indicative of a coming trend to "nickel and dime" citizens."
Not that Mr. Lance is the taxpayers' knight in shining armor. " 'If there is a need for a recycling charge it should occur at the time of the recycling,' Lance said." Gee, thanks. It almost sounds like someone in the state Senate took a dare from a colleague -
Hey, Len, I bet you I can pass a surcharge on recycling TVs, and also pass a law requiring people to recycle them!
No way, Bob. People would notice.
Not only can I do it - I bet you double that I can put both provisions in the SAME BILL.
[laughing] You're crazy, man. Right out there. I love it.
The article doesn't tell you the man who took the dare, but I looked it up: S-557 is sponsored by Robert G. Smith, D-Middlesex. The article raises the possibility, perhaps overlooked by Mr. Smith, that businesses will move to neighboring states to dodge the surcharge. One possibility not mentioned is that, given the extra $10, people may put off new purchases of these items, leading to the state coming out behind - losing more in sales taxes not collected than they gain with the surcharge. Another expense is a provision to "give manufacturers 12 months from the effective date to curb the use of lead, mercury, cadmium, chromium and other toxics in favor of less-harmful alternatives."
Again, not a terrible idea, though businesses will naturally pass along some of the R&D costs of these alternatives. I just wish that the state would consider its citizens a little more - if the products themselves are already going to be more expensive, then the tax bite on them ought to be enough of a boost to the general treasury. Why a surcharge as well?
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